Darkness within
by booth258
Summary: what if giles and joyce weren't good people. what if they had a past and their past took place in Everwood years before the show actually began. Please Review!
1. Chapter 1

DARKNESS WITHIN

FADE IN:

CH.1 THE WELCOMING WAGONS OF EVERWOOD

EXT. OUTSIDE ABBOTT GENERAL MEDICAL CLINIC-EVERWOOD - DAY

The day was bright, the sun was out shining upon the small town that I despised. I wanted to be a big town doctor.

somebody all of the world would look up to. I sure didn't want my fathers' life, this small town and the friendly small town doctor. I'd had dreams of being renouned, respected. on newspapers and latenight news reports, I had dreams but I couldn't do it. My hands weren't the type of hands for a first class renouned sergion, my dreams had come crashing down and I"d been forced back into this town, the town I'd tried to shard to get out of. But not everything was bad, I looked up an old girlfriend, I'd been thinking about her away at college and now, almost a full year after I'd returned to Everwood, Me and Rose were planning on getting married. my father was making a big deal out of it and a part of me could never reach mother, she seemed happy for me but she wasn't the kind of woman that easily shared her feelings with every other person she knew. but she was strong willed and she knew what she wanted out of life, I knew that it meant the world to her that I'd settled down to raise a family in everwood, and I'd started at my fathers' practice. It wasn't my own. but it was good for now. I think it made him happy to know that someday his practice would be My practice.

But I was so glad that I had what I did have right now, It took me alot to get rose back and for her to know that I wanted her. that I loved her. I told her that it didn't matter to me. it didn't matter that my dreams had been forced into this small town and I wasn't able to do what I'd went to medical school to do, I told her with a smile",It'll be alright rose", We'll have a family. Second best thing". but inside it wasn't the second best thing, not to me. Not to say I didn't want children and I didn't want this family life that my father had built for me and my sister, what Rose wished every night for, the months had passed and we'd gotten married, a beautiful church wedding by the town reverand, everyone everybody and it was a beautiful wedding with flowers and people around, my father patted me on the shoulder telling me how I'd become quite a man..and my mother. Although she didn't say anything, I could tell that it wasn't a joyous occasion for her, I'd asked her many a time why she'd seemed like it was more of a funeral than a wedding, but she'd just smile and tell me not to worry.."I'm Stronger than I look",Junior..She would tell me as she'd dissapear off into another room to be with dad until he fell asleep in the recliner after a long and tiring day of saving a little girl from a mysterious disease, I envied my father. I hoped that one day i would be half the man he was now. but things were good, we had our own home now, we were married. and things were taking a different turn than how I'd expected them to take, But a part of me started to forget about the dreams that got stolen from me because of a game of chance and started to see things differently, me and Rose were trying for a baby. I wanted it just as much as she did. I had high hopes that I could be the family man and husband that she wanted and I believed that I could make her very happy, No matter what I'd lost, we had history and we loved eachother, there was a time I thought Love made the world go round. "I know different now".

But today was a new day, I was awake and alert and ready for everything that life had to offer, even everything Everwood had to offer. I wasn't always so thrilled to live here. It had taken me years to accept the small town life and even once I did, it wasn't completely until I was much older and had something I wouldn't give up that this life was appealing and I loved it. but it wasn't like that now, I had to go through all of this to get to that feeling but I didn't know that there would be twists and turns in the road, not until I'd awakened to find rose sitting on the couch in our living room, we weren't rich but we were taken care of, I was new at working with my father and I had enough money to keep me and rose satisfied, even give a baby a good life, which was what we were trying for, she'd told me not to go with her to the doctors' office, siad she had a bad feeling. I hadn't believed her. I could've given her the exam, but she didn't want that, said it was creepy,almost.

but I spose it was less creepy with my father doing it. Ithought to myself seeing the tears as I was immediatelybrushed away from my thoughts to sit closed her on the beige sofa, Putting my arms around her telling her that I was there, letting her know that she could talk to me. but I was panicked to. We had been so close to having a little baby of our own, to give my parents' a grandchild.."So Close"..This baby was supposed to make up for everything me and rose had to give up, every dissapointment we'd been put through and now it proved as just another dissapointment, she looked at me, tears sliding down her face..her auburn hair swaying from side to side and greenish blue eyes staring up at me for answers as tears welled up inside of them, I knew what she was going to say before she even said it, it was as if I was a mind reader and new that fate and destiny had failed us again and that at the end of the day, it would just be me and her.

"I'm Sorry Harold", But I'm Afraid we lost the baby"..Thedoctor said that I..That I.."She stuttered a bit as I held onto her hand tightly", protectively"..The doctor tells me that there may be no baby. No child in our future. "Harold", I can't have children"..She told me as tears slid down her face faster now, I could tell this ruined everything, not just for me, but for her. I wanted a family but a family was her dream and for someone to tell her that she couldn't have it, it was devastating to her, i wanted to be mad at my father, to tell him that I hated him and never wanted to speak to him again, but I couldn't. it wasn't his fault that Rose had these physical problems. it wasn't her fault thatshe couldn't give birth and couldn't have children, I couldtell that it broke her heart for her to have to tell methis.

but I wasn't going to break it even more. Even though

my heart was breaking in two. "I'm sorry", Rose. Maybe he's wrong. Maybe if we keep trying things will change. Maybe we shouldn't give up..Not everything is an exactscience,Rose..I promised her even though deep down I figured that Dad was probably right.

I didn't want to believe that he was right,though. believing that he was right was something that was inevitable. but right now I could flatter my wife with a lovely and thoughtful lie, she'd except it knowing that it would never happen but she'd be grateful and it would brighten her mood alittle, not much but alittle made all of the difference, I figured that I would emmerse myself in my work, I'd make myself for available for my patience and Rose and if I did that, it wouldn't hurt as much to know that we'd never have a child together, but it did. it hurt just as much.

but I couldn't show it. I had to be there for rose. I started to see the sad expressions my mother gave me and I ignored them because I didn't want her pity. I went on as if I hadn't recieved the news and I tried to make the best out of a situation that wasn't good and I think Rose understood..in some sense, everyone did. But I figured life would just move on and nothing amazing or shocking would ever happen not in a small town like Everwood, but again I was wrong. Yes, I had devoted so much time to moving passed the idea of children that when it came up again I was disgusted at the thought of it. We'd been sitting up in bed.. she sat there, she wasn't crying, she was clear mind and she knew what she wanted, or she seemed to. but she must've forgotten that she can't have children..I thought..

"Harold", I want a baby..A child of my own..I know things went badly before but the doctor doesn't know everything. there has been cases of doctors saying one thing and it changing and the patient fooling the doctor. if it's even possible. I want to have a child with you. It's all I've wanted my entire life and if there's any chance it'll work I have to go for it. I know you don't understand..But you can love a son or a daughter as much as I do..Why are you fighting me on this"? she asked me as I was shocked she didn't know.

"Why am I fighting you on this", I repeated pulling theblanket off standing there in my pajamas as if it was some statement to make", The last time we did this you got so worked up that you didn't eat for a whole month, you were in the hospital hooked up to wires and even when you came home you were so depressed, crying all the time. it took you just that month to get over it and move on and now that we're stable again and things are back to normal and want to go back into all of that chaos"? Just to be hurt again.

"I can't bear to see you hurting Rose"..I explained as she didn't want to argue with me but I knew she understood by the expression on her face..But she didn't bring it up again, just told me that after I got back from work tonight that we'd discuss it again.."I did the only thing I could've done", I agreed and told her that we'd discuss it. I didn't want to hurt her. but this thing. it seemed like a lost cause.

I almost lost her last time. I didn't want her to hurt anymore.

But I'd play this game her way so I didn't hurt her feelings, but I didn't realize that the next time we'd speak I'd have news to share and that at the moment I thought it would be a good thing. but I'd went to the office as I normally did, my mother was in the waiting room going through some files and commenting on how it wasn't as neat and orderly as she liked it, but she didn't say much else, mornings were quiet times, that was around the times when my father would go up on the bridge, the very bridge he and mom had first kissed..sometimes he went up there to think.

I thought it was hazardous to the town and should be removed but most people dissagreed with me..even rose. She saw it as romantic. "Romance must kill", I thought to myself as I could hear talking in the waiting room now, it must be my first patient of the day I thought..But I was mistaken. my mother led a man, he was a tall with dark brown hair and dark blue eyes, he wore a grey sweater and blue jeans, the girl stayed close at his side, seemed alittle bit timid, my guess was seven years old. her long dark blonde hair hung to her shoulders and her brown eyes stayed to the floor as if she'd been warned or threatened not to look around and have an interest in anything, My guess was that her parents were very strict, or atleast that's what seemed like to me. I'd learn in afew minutes that the man's name was Rupert Giles and his daughter Was Amy.

Hi", I"m sorry to barge in on you like this. We're new in town..I'm Rupert..Rupert Giles! the man told me with acertain elegant charm and wistfulness that made a chill go up my spine, the manner he'd used to introduce himself had sounded eery to me, or maybe I just wasn't with it. it had been a long morning and I didn't want to pull rose through all of this stuff again and hurt her more, maybe I was seeing things that weren't there. but a part of me doubted that I was oblivious to a nice man, but he seemed nice enough, right now. but I still wasn't sure.

"Oh how foolish of me", This is my Daughter Amy..Amy Say hi to the doctor. I heard the man tell his daughter as she whisper and weak", Hi. I knodded my head seeing how shy and nervous she was but I wandered what he wanted. Was his daughter sick, was he sick..What did this man want from me? I wandered staring his way as he knodded his head knowingly.

I have made some wise investments through the years and this property, it's amazing. the things I could do with it..I just might buy it out. What do you say? from one business man to the next..he asked me as I was completely stunned", he was trying to buy my building,my fathers' practice. "How could he"? He had the nerve.

I saw my mother cirnge, and for a second I thought I sawdisgust her eyes, but it wasn't me it was aimed at. could he know mom. I wasn't sure. "My practice isn't for sale", this is a doctors' office. you can't buy this building. I told him firmly as he laughed as

if he knew what my response would be, as if this was all a joke but I could tell in his eyes that he wasn't done or finished with what I liked to call", the joke.

"I can buy anything I went and there isn't no judge orlawyer in the world that would agree with a small town doctor over someone like me", Now I'm not just going to take it out from under you, I've been around town hearing the latest gossip and I have needs to and my needs need to be met, but the question now becomes, What will you and your father give up to keep your practice..? he uttered", I thought heard him say something more on the lines of dad but I couldn't prove it, as if something was going down right now and my father wouldn't have to think of a way to pay him off, that eery feeling was coming back and I didn't know what to say or do, all I could say was", there is no way your getting this place. it's been in our family for years.

What do you want from me? I shouted out", I saw how nervous it was making his little girl and I felt bad but this man was trying to strip me and leave me with nothing. the man turned to his daughter as if a light came on and he had an idea.

Amy, go to the car. your mother could use some assistance. Alicia could always use some assistance. Don't you think? he urged not having to ask her twice as she walked away abruptly and I couldn't ever remember seeing a child that obedient, especially at that age, but I figured he was strict, he seemed like the type that would be. I wanted to know what he had to say and how i would be able to pay him off so he left and left without taking this place with him, I couldn't believe something could happen like this on a day like today..I couldn't believe this.

"I'm interested in this town and I've went above the mayors' head..I have plenty of money and a giles' always makes his best bet in circumstances like these", I've bought over half of the town. I want to buy this building, it's the only thing that's standing in the way of me not owning the town in it's entirety. If you agree to the deal you can keep running your practice and everyone wins, with alittle extra favor..I think this'll benefit you pretty well, I heard about your wifes' problems and I'm willing to to pay you to care for my daughter. I've got business that's outside the united states..and my business deals never come back on

me..Unless you want me to take everything a wipe away a history that families usually cherish, if I were you. I'd take the deal. but you can think about it. Ponder for a while if you must..We'll be in town. I'm taking my family out to eat, but i'll be in touch..he told me stepping towards his car and getting in, I wanted to ask him why his wife couldn't take care of their daughter but I feared that if I did he would take my place of practice away , but I couldn't believe what he wanted, but if I could still practice medicine and I could make Rose a mother and me a father to this child..maybe it was a good idea. maybe he was just a business man who was consumed with business and not family. maybe I could do this.

"Dont' Do it Junior",That mans' trouble..I heard my mothers' voice standing behind me outside as if she had previous experience that I didn't know about. I know he seems bad but if I keep to this deal of his we'll have a daughter and I"ll be able to keep practicing medicine here. it's really the best thing. I think I'm going to accept,mother..I'm sorry if you don't agree. but he's given me no option. I explained as she knodded walking past me, not stopping as she spoke", I fear for you,son..as she was gone. I didn't know what she meant but I didn't want to know, if I would've known then what I know now, things wouldn't have looked so good from the beginning, nothing was ever yours when you were head to head with Rupert giles', Life was even on Loan, that was the lesson I'd learned, but at that moment, I was a foolish man who thought this deal was the answer to me and rose' prayers. guess what..I was wrong.

Most of the night mom didn't speak one word to me, when she stared at me it was with dissapointment and anger, I wasn't sure which one was for me and which one was for the man it appeared she didn't like, she didn't say anything until the phone had rang. we were all watching t.v., mom had been ignoring me and me and Rose had already talked and she'd felt bad because of the position I was in, but the fact that she could be somewhat of substitute mom for a little girl gave her hope that she wouldn't be alone forever and I was glad, but mom didn't agree. I could hear her talking, speaking in loud sobs. "Is he alright", is my husband alright? I heard her shout in fear and if you knew her you knew that fear wasn't the type of discription you would normally note, she was so stronger and couragious, but now she seemed small and weak as if somebody

had just taken a blow torch and knocked her to the ground, taken the wind out of her sails, so to speak. I didn't know what to think, but some part of me felt the fear that it was dad..", I had to be strong for everyone. they'd need me but she didn't show any weakness once she was off the phone, she didn't say one thing to us, just led us out to the car, but before we could speak to ask her if she was okay or remind her to breathe we were off towards the morgue in the hospital..because it was true..my father was dead. Once at the hospital we stared down under the black sheets at a man who seemed so unhuman now when just hours ago he'd been real and full of emotion, so full of life, wanting to live everyday to its fullest. the doctor had told us that it looked like he'd fallen off of the kissing bridge and broken his neck, but he'd warned us that it wasn't an exact analysis and that it could be proven that he died another way but it wasn't on the record he was just telling us what he knew. I watched, seeing the rage and anger in my mothers' face as she rushed out, away from the hospital, away from the doctor and his terrible news, away from the horrid sight of her dead husbands body..She was going to the bridge..she had to see for herself, as if it was a place of peace and she could be free like the waters below the broken bridge, but mostly she was angry. who in their right mind wouldn't be. thoughts of children and families had vanished now..All that was left was tragedy.

Standing there among friends and family as I stared down at a black casket that was lowered lower down into the ground, I tried to be strong and not to cry, not just for my own sake but for my mothers..For Rose' sake as I heard the words and took in the fact that he was gone forever but some part of me wandered if dads' death truly was an accident? had he fallen off of the bridge accidentally, was the bridge unsafe,so unsafe that now it still stood even though kids and grown men were falling off recently. I didn't know what to think but I wasn't going to ponder such dark thoughts, I'd be there for mom..she needed me now..I'd been so emmersed in it that I'd almost forgotten about my deal. the man had been waiting in the shadows as he appeared standing by a tree with the young girl I'd seen before..his eyes were dark, as if he'd been crying too. he held onto a white blouse in his hand as he sobbed into it. "Momma died"..Amy told us as I offered my apologies as did Rose, but mother did not..she simply walked away.."Your not

fooling anybody"..she simply quipped".And for a moment I thought that I saw a flicker of enjoyment and humor in his eyes, but it quickly changed as I was starting to wander if mother wasn't right. but I had to keep good on my deal as I told him that I'd accepted and he gave his daughter a good push foreward, she stared at him in dismayed shock as if she hadn't known and he smiled, with a slight wave as she called for him to come back.."Daddy", comeback..She called, screaming out with tears down her face as I couldn't tell very much, but I was almost sure.."he was smiling".

The minutes turned into hours as we took Amy home, we fed her something warm and had her sleep on the couch we planned on getting her, her own stuff for her own room tomorrow, we were both excited about this but it was hard because she didn't want to be with us, she wanted her parents and her mother, she cried every night for her mother to come back, as if she wasn't dead at all. as if that was some ploy her father told her that she didn't believe and so we tried as hard as we could and even at times when I thought she was forgotten, something happened..something said or done and it came back up, sometimes even an expression let me know that they would always be a part of her, but I wandered if he'd ever come back for her, he'd never mentioned, he'd left it hanging as if he was playing a dangerous game with everybody in Everwood, A game I wasn't sure I liked. but I played it well, allowing myself To love Amy, to give her a good life and to treat her as if she was my own, sooner than later we'd excepted ourselves as her parents and I liked to think she excepted us as the same. that's how it began. how the deception and horror started, it had seemed a game at first, a game that benefited me and rose so we would win in the end, but as the old saying goes..You play with fire, you'll get burned. 


	2. Chapter 2

CH.2 MOVING ON

INT. EVERWOOD - DAY

I was young but for my age I was older than most kids, I knew certain truths that most 8 year olds didn't know. my father always told me that the clock ticked on and life never stopped and that I should be alert and always be in

tune to how slowly or how fast time could move, I could recall times when my father had put me in the corner, most of the time actually. I wasn't allowed to wear normal clothes, he'd take knives and things from a large red metal tool box in the basement and he cut holes out of rags and I had to wear them as if it was normal clothing and all of the while I'd listen to the clock and I would have a certain truth within me to know, it would never be over. dad taught me that. I was so afraid..I laid in bed shaking, I'd never slept on a real bed before and it was hard adjusting, they were trying to get me to take these rags off, to put on certain clothes they'd bought at the store, I could hear my fathers' voice in the back of mind.."Amy don't buy it", end the end they'll only hurt you. There not like us..nobody could truly love you..why do you think your mother killed herself.

she jumped off of the top of the mountain to be away from you..I heard his words go over and over again as tears slid down my cheaks and I wished for one single second that I'd never been born.

I could hear the people who took on the opertunity of taking care of me, they were downstairs arguing. Arguing about me.

Maybe dad was right. maybe I only existed to make life worse for everyone around me, everything he said made some sort of sense and if it didn't, why would he lie to me, he was my father.

I kept my eyes open most of the night, every time I closed them I could see and hear things in the past, and the knowledge sunk deeper and deeper inside of me that Iwasn't free.

it may be a new house, new people..Even a new atmosphere..but they were just things..Possessions. Possessions dad could take away if he saw fit.

the stiff rags hung loosely on me as I slid off of the bed and crawled into the corner of the room, no blanket, no pillow.

just the hard and cold floor to make me afraid, even when dad was nowhere to be around, but I wasn't so sure he was gone.

I could feel him and sense that he was never too

far away and that this faurse with me living with strangers was another one of his games..A test. not just for them but for me.

the room was filled with toys that they'd bought to cheer me up but I hadn't even touched them, I knew it hurt there feelings but I couldn't think about them. I was afraid to touch them, I'd never had a toy before, only a small rag that father said suited me, the same one that binded me to the stairwell when he told me I was bad, the same one that had blood on it from a beating in the past, it had been my only friend, he'd handed it to me before he'd left, I knew that rules were rules. if I broke them, he'd destroy what was left of me. I was no fool, he'd destroy me so I had to be good. and I couldn't break even one rule, even though he appeared to be gone.

I was quickly awakened to that woman that I supposed they expected me now to call mother. she stared in the room with shock, she saw me in those rags sitting against the wall holding onto the rag I hadn't put down since I'd arrived, I'd seen that look before. Father says that it means the world keeps turning and everything is in it's place..he seemed to like the look of surprise and fear..he used to tell me even the strongest of souls would fall to their knees if you knew how to reach their moment of weakness.

I thought all fathers were like dad. I was even weary of Dr.Abbott, I wasn't ready to call him anything but that. I was afraid of him. I figured all men were not to be trusted.

woman were fine. mom never did anything. she was a sweet and kind soul. She even let me do things father wouldn't approve of if he wasn't around..but Father always found out, it was almost as if he had eyes in the walls in our estate back home..he saw everything and if he didn't feel like striking out at me and or mother..he'd hurt something we loved..I don't know if I could hate him, he was my father,after all. but I figured the way he treated me, it had to be my fault..he said mother was weak and she broke the rules..I could hear him now", What happens to be people that break the rules",Amy? in Society there's a way of punishing those who choose the wrong path..If I don't punish her..Who will? he'd say..I'd sit in the corner and cry at nights when he'd beat mom..I just wanted him to disapear and even though he

seemed gone at this moment, he was never gone. he'd taught me that on my first day of kindergarten..when I'd thought I could act out and be free when I was alone, he said he owned the teachers and all of the staff and that if they didn't obey..they'd be punished as well..Father had a way of dealing with those who did bad things..but who made up these laws", I wandered? God? the government. I was little and I didn't know much about the laws of civilization..the government and stuff..but I had never guessed that father made up these laws himself to keep the people around him in line.

She tried to pull me up, her medium length bernette hair swaying lightly with a smile on her face, I could tell that it was a dream come true her having me here in her house but I pulled away quickly. I didn't say anything, just brushed myself away from her touch, I didn't like to be touched and she found that odd but she didn't question me, she thought because I was 8 I couldn't tell her much, I wouldn't anyway.

that happened to be one of the rules. but like I'd said before, I wasn't your typical eight year old, I knew a lot more than kids my age did. Father saw that I didn't slip through the cracks and fail like some children did. I'd always thought that was a good thing.

"I need to change you out of those rags Dear"..Rose called to me as I sat there shaking clinging tightly to the only piece of clothing I was comfortable wearing, I'd never worn anything else, never been allowed to and if I didn't have this I didn't know where I stood. she saw the fear in my eyes and backed away, she didn't understand that I was Okay with the rags I was wearing..she didn't like it. she stomped out in a frenzy. I fell back down to the floor shaking with fear sensing that the powerful and strong structure of their life would turn to mush now that I was here, she was mad, I could tell. Mother would stomp like that when she was mad at Daddy..I didn't know what to expect. she was upset because I wouldn't wear those clothes. I couldn't. if he watched he'd punish me..like he said.."Nothing goes unpunished", not even the smallest dishonest thing and I believed. I wandered..Was mother really dead?

I heard arguing downstairs and I heard my fathers' voice loud and clear, he was laughing. "So Amy won't change out of those clothes", her mother was a difficult woman..and she's becoming more like her

everyday..perhaps I could have a word..I'll show myself upstairs..I overheard as I began to breath heavily as I slid back to the wall holding onto the small rag with the dried blood I was accustomed to having..

"What's wrong my Dear", Have you forgotten that the rules change from day to day..I'm going to do something you wouldn't expect. I'm going to allow real clothes..but whenever a wish is granted and a rule gets removed, more is added.

I'll make a list and give it to uncle Ethan..I"m sure he'll deliver..Ethan is always prompt and on schedule..Amy you will not make me look bad in front of anybody and if you sit here and break all of my rules, everything I say..You'll end up like your mother..Now I am sure you do not want that..he lunged towards me lifting me up in the air and shaking me as I cried, but not loud enough for them to hear downstairs, if they did, it would only get worse. I knew too much from some of the things he did to mother to scream.

he forced the rags off, forcing them off in a manner that hurt, that's why he had to dress and undress, it was part of a punishment..once he had me in a gray hooded sweater and matching gray pants with socks he sat me on the bed sliding a piece of paper out of his pocket grabbing my hand roughly as it stung but I still didn't scream.."This is a letter from your mother", I think she'd come back from the dead and have my head if you didn't get this letter..not that she can do much about it now", I'm not a dishonest man, Amy you know that. I told your mother I'd get it to you..and guess what.."I did"..he ordered shoving backwards onto the bed as he rushed out slamming the door behind him as I sat up, every part of my body hurting from his touch, I didn't want to read the letter, I shoved it in a drawer and vowed never to see it again, I figured it was probably lies he wrote down..besides, I was only eight. my reading wasn't great..He knew that. It was another test. Father liked tests. I knew it was nother test for me as well as them..it was his specialty, tormenting the people around him. I knew he'd be back, I wasn't free. I would never be free.

But I looked at it as a good thing that I could wear normal clothes and sleep in a normal bed now, Maybe if he stayed away a long while things would go smoothly and I could move

on, I could be like a typical kid and not have to worry..I could have fun. but fun had never been allowed before, these people seemed nice, but I was still afraid of Dr. Abbott.

men were not to be trusted I told myself as I closed my eyes letting the tears run down my face as I wandered if when I opened them the my world would be a kind and safer place. 


	3. Chapter 3

CH.3 THE SAFE PLACE

EXT. EVERWOOD - DAY

It was about a month after that moment with father, things were better, but I still hadn't fully trusted the people I was staying with, they seemed nice enough but it was hard to be just thrown to the wind and trust whoever found you, but I trusted my godmother, I knew her before. I'd seen her when mother had To sneek me out to have picnics..she was mothers' best friend which was why she was to be my godmother. she knew things about father that only I knew, she was funny..Said that her son was oblivious to what was right in front of him..and that any fool could tell that my father wasn't what he promised to be. It was nice her knowing, so their didn't have to be so many secrets. a lot of times when they were away I'd stay with her, she'd cry sometimes about her husband and say how me being around helped the situation, that I was a special gem.. a light in the darkness that made up for everything terrible in the world.

she'd say how much she missed mama and how she was a special lady..but I didn't tell her what father did and that she didn't die of natural means. I knew she knew about him but I didn't want to even believe she hadn't died of natural means and I'd lived it.

It was another day like any other where I was allowed to go with her to Dr. Abbots' practice. it was nice there.

I enjoyed looking at pictures and magazines with her, she told me all of the peoples' names and said that if I wanted her

son and his wife could be my family, if I wanted to accept them as though they were, I smiled. I didn't know what to say, I was going to be nine in a few days and was at the age where most things started to make since and other things didn't, I think she knew that because she and the people who looked after me took on my birthday as the event of the season, as if it was everything to the town..I'd never celebrated my birthday, but only once when father had been in the hospital and mother had taken it upon herself to make my fourth birthday special..but he didn't stay down for long. he never did. I didn't like to think about it much anymore. I liked to think I was moving on and a part of me was beginning to believe he'd never come back, at least I hoped.

but there came a day a couple of months later when we all sat upon a judge and he granted full custody to the abotts, they'd adopted me and now I could call them my parents. it was easy calling Dr. Abbott my father, but it wasn't so easy calling his wife my mother.

I'd loved my mother. she was everything a mother should be and then father took her from me and left me with strangers. but I was treated like a princess, with my own room and my own things, I was so happy to be treasured so much that I could have my own bed and I didn't have to wear rags anymore..No more beatings either.

it was as if Id've stumbled into a new life and I was completely free. but there was always that doubt in the back of mind that told me..Father would be back.."He always came back", he never forgot about what was his and "Legal agreement aside",he wouldn't go through all of the red tape to get what he wanted..he had a very unique way of getting what he needed which was his nickname to a tee.."Ripper"..

but I just tried to ignore what could happen and decided to feel excited for what was happening to me, it was a happy time of which I'd never had and yes, mom wasn't hear to share it with me but these people were nice and they took care of me, they loved me. so I decided to call them mom and dad. I knew mom wouldn't care. Father would be enraged, but like he said before. this was a test. and he would eventually come back for me, but he wasn't hear yet so I decided to make the best of the good times.

There came a day soon after my adoption was complete when I allowed myself to go to school, It wasn't that I was nervous for my first day or anything like that..I'd never really been to a public school. I hadn't went to school much at all.

Father said the one time that I attended that he didn't trust such people with such a gem as me..he said that that would corrupt my mind and poison me against him. But he was gone now as Dr. Abbott would tell me, he was gone and in the past, of course I knew they still communicated on the phone, that was one of the rules of the game, but he appeared to be gone this time but I didn't believe it until Uncle Ethan stood at the door bearing gifts, his hair dark and glistening in the morning sun and his dark eyes sunken and excited for me, only for me. I could tell by the strained expression and the annoyance in his voice, he had , had an unpleasant conversation with father..they were old friends, well ex friends as Ethan liked to call it. but I didn't want to hear about what horrible thing father had done this time..he had presents. Uncle Ethan always spoiled me and I accepted because it was the only chance to be spoiled and have things that I had ever gotten..I wandered if uncle ethan was what a real father truly was but I didn't know..But I did respect father..he was my father after all..but this morning I tried to push everything out of my mind as I went with uncle Ethan for a walk, he was in a talking disposition, wanting to explain everything, especially his run-in with father. Even though deep down I was sick and tired and I didn't want to hear it anymore.

I loved my uncle Ethan. He wasn't really my uncle,though. I just called him that because I felt that he was more family than anyone I knew, except for my mother and Edna, who was godmother. He had always been there. Wanted to fix everything and sometimes he even succeeded in helping and I was grateful for his help, but mostly he was an old friend of fathers..An enemy now. I wondered if father was different back then, what kind of man was he then. he had to be different to make friends, didn't he? I wondered. the times I'd ask ethan he'd smile. "Ole" Ripper was the king of the craft",Amy..he could use anybody..Manipulate anybody into liking him until you saw what the ripper could do, you were niave and helpless. Even me..I may be into dark things but you have to know of some darkness and power to to be

anything to ole' ripper..I believed what he said. father didn't let anything get passed him.

I didn't ask him anymore questions, I didn't even ask him what caused their run-in since he didn't want to talk about it but he was genuinely happy for me, I could tell that. He thought the abbotts were good people, even though he hadn't met them yet. he'd heard of them. that they both had great jobs and seemed to be decent human beings and he was glad that I had this even though I could tell he didn't think it would last forever, neither did I. but I wasn't going to let that bother me, not until the day he came to take me away.

I knew that it didn't matter how big or brave I got..how better I was here..I'd always fear him because he was what my nightmares consisted of. he was what my life was.."Fighting the monster", is what mom had called him.

Where is Father,anyway? I asked as Ethan smiled but it was a smile of sarcasm.

Around", you didn't think he was gone for good did you..he's in town making sure his unmentionables stay inmetioned so to speak. I spoke to him yesterday. Ripper says in order to get people to trust him and think he's as good as he isn't..that he he has to give a little, although he hasn't left the game completely..Ripper has his own set of rules..You're father has always been unpredictable..and by the way..I'm so sorry about you're mother.

she was a wonderful woman..Deserved much..Much better than him. I can't believe what happened..that he..Never mind..Ethan changed his mind on telling me even though I could guess what my father would do, he'd threatened before that she didn't listen properly and I knew well what happened to people, especially family when they broke the rules. Father took care of them.

I'm not going to be around after this, I'm going to be hard to reach. but ripper thinks he's controlled the situation.

he thinks he's gotten rid of me. Well he hasn't. I won't give him the benefit of the doubt. Rupert isn't going to win in the end, not this time,Sweetheart. he told me as he kissed me on the forehead and walked away, I never felt so

alone before. I had the abbotts and my godmother but but real family had sent me off like an unwanted cousin..I didn't understand. Father was mean and cruel..I feared him most of the time but I had always thought he'd wanted me.

was he sending me off because he no longer wanted to deal with this or was this really just another one of fathers' games, I didn't know what this game was and that's what scared me.

I didn't know why but it was hard to me to see the Abbotts' house as my home. it really wasn't. not that i was a snob or a spoiled brat, but I had lived in an estate but it wasn't as blissful as one may think. I hadn't really thought we had more than anybody else, it wasn't as if I went to school on a normal basis, after a while father thought it best if he home schooled me, said it was good enough for him and that teachers and other adults couldn't trusted, they'd ruin me. my innocence and that they'd turn me against them..he'd sit there with tears in his eyes, begging me never to leave him, that if i ever left, he wouldn't have an existence..he'd die without me. and through his tears I managed to forgive him or at least love him, and he'd be sweet..nice for a while..and I always promised never to leave.."but I'd left this time",he'd made me. what was the lesson in this", I wandered.

but I remembered how life was, other than what went on, Mom never cooked a day in her life, we had servants and cooks for that. I recalled one time father making mom cook and making the hired help taste, just to embarass, I'd taken a bite and said it was delicious, father didn't like that and I was punished for not doing as I was told, not being on his side. his plan failed because of me, he could never completely embarass mom because I was there and willing to make her feel good again, but he always seemed proud as if it amused him at how dedicated and brave I could be, but he never showed pride later on when we were alone, but he never frowned or growled when he was mean or cruel, he got pleasure with what he did..that was when I begun to wander", Was the sob story and mind games", just games. all those nights when he cried on my shoulder, was it just another one of fathers' games..I thought with bitter tears and pain..this house may not be the estate back in England, or the the estate in Florida..But it was nice. and safe.

I felt like I truly did belong, so in a way at this moment I had excepted it as some kind of home..and a smile broke through as I stepped inside shutting the door behind me, right now I'd made a decision and from now on, I wasn't Amy Giles.."I was An Abbott".

the weeks passed and every night I dreamed of the terrible things that would happened, things father called just cause.

I may have acted like an Abbott,I may have even changed my last name to prove that I was one of them. but I wasn't.

I had nightmares every night and I never felt worthy of anything or anybody, I even felt that Uncle ethan leaving was because of me somehow,nothing was ever good enough for me.

I felt terrible for the Abbotts' they were doing everything they could to make sure I was well adjusted and had everything I wanted and needed, as the days passed I felt myself growing closer to Dr. Abbott, he was everything my father wasn't. Kind, understand..and Caring. and I felt that Rose was distant, I didn't understand why. she sensed something in me. something that was locked away, a part of me that was distant as well and a part of me that was dark and scared, she kept her distance, she called herself my mother, but she singled herself out of things that me and Dr. Abbott, Did. but I knew she liked me. that wasn't an issue. but sometimes I found her watching me, just staring as if by staring at me she'd unlock the mysteries of what lay within the four walls of my chamber of secrets.. But I knew I wasn't her daughter, not really. she knew that too, I could tell that much..but they both looked at father like he was a saint, or their guardian Angel looking out for their needs, times when they spoke of father, I'd try to stay quiet and nod a lot as if I agreed that father was special, that he was better than most people. but inside I was screaming and Crying.."Father was a nightmare", I thought, I'd never let him know that, or the abbotts', I loved him. he was my father..nobody understand how it was. how I felt.

nobody could. but Rose kept watching me, never asking to join me and Dr. Abbott when we had T.V. night, or asking me if I wanted to do something with her, she kept her distance

as if she felt I held real darkness..or maybe she was just scared of getting close, to her I was an outsider, I felt awcquard and unwanted, even though Dr. Abbott told me that it had nothing to do with me..that she wanted a child of her own, to give birth. I was too young to understand, but I tried to.

A new day began as I Dr. Abbott walked me to my class, he smiled. he looked at me and handed me a lunch that he and rose had made for me. said that he hoped I had a good first day, I was nervous. especially when he hadn't warned me about teachers and how they weren't to be trusted, how they just poisoned your mind and turned you against your parents..He didn't warn me about friendships either how and they were all doomed to fail unless the friendship was with him..he just handed me a lunch and hugged me, told me to have a good day and that Rose would pick me up after school, I was kind of nervous about that, I hadn't spent much one on one time with her since I'd been here, which had been almost a year, I wandered why she was avoiding me, was father right..Was I bad? I wandered, pondering the thought that maybe father wasn't a bad man but just honest, brutally honest".

I smiled at him and stepped into the class, I was nervous but this wasn't the end of the world, i'd been through much more and I was still alive standing here facing another day and I was glad that I was going to school, I wanted to learn without so many of what father liked to call",Lessons..and I was willing to learn everything I could, I'd been a good student before father had taken me out of school, and I wanted to succeed so badly, not just in school but with Mrs. Abbott, I wanted her to see me as mom saw me. I thought about mom alot lately. I considered going to the cemetary sometime soon..To speak to mom. she wasn't able to answer,being dead..but i could still speak..I'd been taught about death early on in my life, most kids my age didn't fully understand it but father had made sure that from day one I'd known how important and ruthless dead could be and how beneficial it was sometimes.

The teachers seemed really nice, not fake nice but just nice. other kids seemed to be distant. not like Mrs. Abbott, though. but like they thought they were better than me. they'd all lived in Everwood their whole lives and I was new to the town and new to the school. I wanted to cry, to

scream at the top of my lungs, for I wanted friends. A whole bunch of friends. I had always wanted for people to like me. My dark blonde hair hung down down alittle below my shoulders and my brown eyes glistened in the morning sunshine that passed through the delicate glass windows to shine over the whole classroom, I sat down abruptly in an empty seat with coloring crayons and blank drawing paper, different colors, my eyes brushed over the colors..any kind of color youcould imagine was there, I ignored the red crayon, it was fathers' favorite color, he called it the color of chaos and pain, I wandered why that was so beautiful to him, I liked the color purple..I wanted to break the red crayon in half but everyone was so nice, I just hid inside the desk I was sitting at so i wouldn't have to see it.

Pretty soon the teachers had me coloring pictures that were traced on for the class, it was all we did. all day long we colored and practiced our handwriting and then she called for everyone to come to a big rug for the afternoon nap as the teacher got out a book and began to read as a boy sat next to me,he had short brown hair and light blue eyes as he sat next to me..I must've seemed alittle nervous or unsure about him, so he spoke up.

"Hi I'm Colin Hart"..he said lifting his hand out, I pulled away with a weak smile"..Amy...I stuttered to say my last name but quickly I said it.."Amy Abbott"..I feared that father would come and condemn me for saying that last name with mine..but nothing happened, maybe this was what father wanted, to see how far I would go before I considered myself free.

"you're new", Welcome To Everwood and to well,to school.."we can be friends"..If you want"? he asked me", I nervously knodded and he smiled as they brought some small cooking with MM's in them and everyone took one cookie with a small styrophome cup of juice and we were instructed to lay down and nap and when we woke up it would be time for our parents to pick us up.

I didn't take my nap, I just laid there. I didn't want to make a public scene of myself..and I would if I fell asleep.

I didn't know what people would think, maybe father was right and you couldn't trust anybody..Maybe they truly did

try and Poison your mind..But I tried hard not to believe that.

I'd been glad to make a new friend even if I'd said very little, I'd ran off before my ride had showed up, I knew I was wrong and they would be mad but I needed to talk to mom.

Even if she was dead and couldn't hear, I knew that somewhere, maybe heaven she was listening and she could hear me but she couldn't talk or express what she thought.

I rushed block after block through this small town, it was chilly but not cold enough for me to get sick as I found a small graveyard as I thumbed through it until I found a large grave stone with an angel carved into it and flowers as well as I looked at it and began to express how much I missed her, how much she meant to me and how i was alone without her..I fell onto the grave stone and began to sob, not being able to control my feelings.

"I'm Sorry..But you don't expect her to answer do you"?

You're mother is dead,Amy..But I spose she's not forgotten..I couldn't forget Alicia if I tried..father admitted from behind me as I feared turning around but he made it so I didn't have to as he walked up beside me as he smiled at the gravestone, I thought it was more of a sneer", I think she's happier where she is..Don't you Amy? he asked not expecting a reply as I got almost so still a stale wind could blow me away as he smile, giggling at something that was so funny. I thought bringing some red roses to her grave would be a good thing..Afterall, it is her birthday..I haven't forgotten..Oh My god..I bet the abbotts have gone made wondering where you are..go and get in the car..I'll take you there..and when I get there you better be there,child..for if you aren't my dear, I will find you..he threatened me as tears poured down my cheaks, I wasn't about to disobey him, not when he could take me away from the abbotts at any miniute and force me back to the estate, back to the way life had been before we'd come here.

As I stepped away I could hear father.."Happy Birthday Darling", I've given no clothes no fancy things..but I hope

your happy with with all the that I bring"..he began to change the words and it sounded so cold and heartless,yet cocky..he killed mom,I'd known it but it hadn't felt this bad, this terrifying until this moment, but he was father.

like he'd said once before, we belonged to eachother..everyone esle was just pawns' in this game of what he liked to call", Life. 


	4. Chapter 4

CH.4 A BROTHER FOR CHRISTMAS

INT. SCHOOL CLASSROOM - DAY

AMY

(Point of View)

I had grown accustomed to school, as the winter months took hold and christmas got closer I was leary of it actually coming.

christmas had never been a good time for me. we'd never really celebrated it, not really and when we did father always had something vicious and cruel planned, either for my mother or myself. it wasn't a stretch to say I was scared this time.

I could hear the teacher talking about christmas, she had just asked all of us to go around the room and tell her what we planned to do for christmas, I didn't understand how everyone knew so much. as if they did the same thing every year and it was a routine, but everyone seemed excited about what the teacher called',Christmas Magic. they spoke of presents and sweets. and of course, family get-together parties, I was never sure about that. we didn't have any

family that I could speak of, only Uncle Ethan, and he wasn't even my uncle. Father said once that his parents wouldn't want to see me or my mother. that we were disgraces to the giles' name but that he cared enough to save us from their grasp. I wandered if they were really as bad as father said, he seemed to believe that everything--England,belonged to him..and we were just pawns in his game. but I wandered if I had family I didn't know about. maybe cousins..or aunts and uncles. I'd never thought of that until now..and now the teacher was waiting. waiting for me to tell her what I was doing over christmas vacation. I'd overheard them talking about making a big dinner and inviting my godmother over and they spoke of presents but I didn't know alot about this, this was the first real christmas I would ever go to and be rewarded with the same things that other kids took for granted--that was if father allowed me to, afterall I didn't see him everyday. but he was still around.

"Amy", Tell us about your going to do with your foster family this Christmas", She asked putting emphasis on the words "Foster family", everytime she spoke to me it was as if I was tainted because I didn't really belong to the abbotts, like she had said just the other day, I was a stray. Were these the kind of people that father warned me about, had he been right all along? I wandered.

I felt everyones eyes on me, especially the teachers', I didn't know what to say. was I suppose to just sit there and pretend that I did this every christmas, was I expected to lie.

I didn't know what to say so I just shrugged my shoulders and decided to go with the truth, even though father wouldn't like it.

"this is my first time celebrating christmas", When I lived,with my father we didn't celebrate the holidays much so I don't know what we're doing".Although one time mom made me a small cupcake with red frosting for christmas, but I was four,then. I told everyone as I could tell the teacher was disgusted as I sat back down and she took over".

"Thankyou Amy", for that enlightening Story. Shall we continue on the story of the week",A christmas Carol..Colin is handing out the books, please follow along,Children. this is an experience. a wonderful book. you'll remember it for years to come..I heard the teacher call as colin handed me my book with a friendly smile as everyone else just glared at me, afterall, I was an outsider.

i followed along but I didn't understand many of the customs that the book spoke of or what people did on christmas. I could tell the other kids found my weaknesses to be interesting and they made fun of me for it. and colin, my only friend started to nickname and call me "Grover", by a cartoon charactor I'd watched lately.

I was nervous about this Sunday, Dad was taking me to my first comfirmation class at the church after we had our church ceremony. Dad being, Dr. Abbott. I didn't call my real dad, dad. I always spoke of him with an intense fear and nervousness, I called him father. I'd started calling Dr. Abbott dad because I felt it was right, I felt safe around him now.

That was the last school-day of the week and I was glad it was over. I knew that school at my age was supposed to be sweet and easy but I felt like an outsider and the teacher reminded me of that, as well as the other kids, other than Colin. he was truly my only friend. and I'd never had a nickname before, I'd never had a real friend before either, father usually hadn't permitted it, said that friends were for weak,lonely children who didn't have a father who devoted enough time to them..Not like him. Sometimes I'd wished father devoted alittle less time to my needs. I'd wished that at times, as well. I knew that if he ever found out, I'd be punished. I knew that for certain.

So there I was standing in the doorway, I knew she knew I was much more mature and older than 8, emotionally. but she'd never said much about it when dad seemed to treat me as if I was even younger than I was. but I wanted to know why she avoided me. I wasn't bad like fathers says, really..I convinced myself wondering if he wasn't right".

Rose was sitting in the sofa in the front room when I walked in, I hadn't been able to call her mom just yet. but it had nothing to do with missing my own mother, it was because she seemed to keep me at arms' length as if she didn't trust me. I was only 8, how terrible could I be? I thought". but it seemed as though she didn't trust father either..I wandered if I asked, if she would give me a real answer".

"You don't trust me or want me here really,do you"? I asked seeing as her expression changed to shock as she looked at me with warmth for the first time since I'd been brought to this house, a year ago".

"I know that I haven't been very welcoming since you came to live with us",Amy. and I'm sorry. Really Sorry.You're really a wonderful girl and I want you. Having you around has made everything better but I don't trust your father. I don't think he's as good as he comes off."Who just gives there child away like that"? Harold is naive and foolish. you never get anything for free, especially not a child of your own. and I look at you as a wonderful change in this house but your not like most children your age and it worries me.

I know that things weren't always bliss.your father isn't someone I can easily trust like my husband can, not that I agree with his mother, but I wanna do right by you. I've been wanting a child, another child. and since I can't have a child of my own I was wondering if you'd like a brother..Me and harold were considering adoption...Rose asked and I was baffled", I'd always wanted a brother, a sibling that I could play with and this was a good thing..A brother for christmas.

I was bursting with happiness but I couldn't let her see the joy, maybe that was what she was talking about. I didn't get happy like most kids my age did, I was always thinking about what father would say. but I was happy, I wanted to show her that I was normal. that I wasn't just someone elses' little girl.

I could be hers if she let me but history went against my theory--For I was somebody elses child. When you belonged to Rupert Giles--the whole world watched when he couldn't, he'd taught me that long ago, before I'd met a family I could love.

"I've always wanted a brother",Thanks. Father said he made

it so mom couldn't have any more children. said there was only one child for him--Me. so I guess this is the best christmas present I could get. that's another thing. We never really celebrated christmas before. Colin Hart, a boy at school. he says that I'm in for a treat. I don't understand. He's the only one whose nice to me. Am I that bad"? I asked feeling weak and needing support, not wanting to believe dads' explanations for everything", I didn't want to believe that he was right even though at times it seemed like he was.

Between us girls", you can tell a secret, can you and keep it secret between me and you. harold doesn't have to know.

neither does grandma edna. you can tell me the truth and it'll be our little secret. you won't even have to tell your father..Rose began as I didn't like the idea, I'd never lied to father, mostly because I was afraid, father didn't like being dishonest and he'd know if I was dishonest but I wanted her to love me so bad and need me..so I agreed knowing that father would be less than pleased.

Okay", I understand you don't like this but can't I just ask one question"? I just wanna know if there's any truth to what Edna says about your father. Harold is naive, he wants to believe that people always have the right intentions and your father gave us the chance of a lifetime, most people wouldn't have done that, especially with their own daughter. I don't know what I believe.I want to believe that your father is a wonderful man and that he's done what was in your best interest, not having a mother and all, but not everything adds up and I wanna know that my mother-in law is wrong. just answer me that? she asked me. I didn't know what to do so I decided with the truth, I didn't have to tell her everything..just that my god-mother was right and that I'd known Edna long before me and father had come to everwood.

"Yes",My godmother is right. she's not my grandmother only now she is. she's my godmother. she was my mothers' best friend and she knows father from way back. don't ask me to tell you anymore. "Their my parents", I replied passing her and going up to my room where I'd be alone. Left alone, to think. everything was changing and the only thing I'd known was what father showed me. without that--Who was I? I

question myself in desperate need".

I went to confirmation class on sunday, Dr. Abbott, or what I called him now,"Dad", told me that everything would be okay.

he said that he and his sister had went to the same class when they were my age and that I would do well. and I trusted him. I knew that in a Sunday School atmosphere everyone was the same. I didn't like how kids looked down on me all of the time, like they were better than I was. but here I'd learn stuff I'd never learned..the way of religion and the way of forgiveness. I needed to forgive myself for not respecting father. I shouldn't have told Rose anything..I was bad. 


	5. Chapter 5

Ch.5 another thaw welcomes a new Dawn

INT. EVERWOOD THAW SHORTLY AFTER THE SNOW HAS MELTED - AFTERNOON

P.O.V. EDNA - AFTERNOON

All day I'd been hearing everyone tell me how I should let down my guard and go to the thaw fest and enjoy myself, but being as I was hard and loved nothing but a chance to prove that i wasn't going to bend for some stupid tradition that happened every year, junior had told me that I was just upset because Erv had invited Amy's father to stay with us until he got back on his feet after losing his wife and his own father. I was so preterbed at that man right now, he knew how I felt. and junior knew exactly how I felt, I bet he was beating people in line just to show up, to see how irritated I was. but I wouldn't give him the benefit of the doubt. Me and Erv had arranged a walk on the mountains, it was the most peaceful time of the day, but I didn't feel good about leaving the house with",That Man, in it. he couldn't be trusted. I couldn't wait until the day he got his. If ever that was. I just knew that I was right about him and erv and junior..they were crazy to think he was such a good man. I'd seen who Rupert giles really was and I knew how junior could think that he was such a good man, a rightious man even, but it was time for the both of them to wake up, I'd been getting tidbits that rose saw things my way but I wasn't going to make some big to do about it, this wasn't about right and wrong, or who seemed to know this person better, it was about Amy and the shit she had to deal with and probably would deal with for the rest of her life. It was about making things easier on her, she came to me, told me stuff. relied on my opinions and thoughts because I knew the truth, I wasn't blinded by all of the lies like everyone else was. It wasn't just Junior or acouple of people in town, it seemed as if everyone seemed to take to him, like he was father christmas because it appeared as though he'd done one decent thing, if they knew. knew that it was just a way to get them in his trap, so he could play with them and manipulate them, so they were apart of his world. and that it was another horrible thing he was doing to hurt amy, they wouldn't see him as such a good man. they were foolish and stupid to see what they saw. But I wandered, wandered if the tables were turned and I knew only what I saw right here, what they saw. would I be just as blind, just as much of a fool as they were. it was my knowledge, that I'd known the man, known amy before she'd even come into everwood..I'd been friends with her mother. It's what made me wiser, it was knowing what he was capable of that made me more of a friend to Amy, amy believed what I said, she understood what I said and knew that I wouldn't lie to her, wouldn't make her feel a certain way if I didn't believe it was necessary, I knew that it irritated her that they all thought her father was a good man, so good that they could take him on his word..and I tried to understand how hard it was for her to put on the mask of someone who believed as they did yet knowing the truth deep down and not being able to speak up, like a death mask if you think about it, your real thoughts are locked inside, your as helpless as a young boy forced off into a war that you didn't want to fight. My heart went out to Amy. but Junior didn't know all of the years before when I'd Hang out with Alicia. she was a wonderful woman, salt of the earth. there wasn't a better person in this world, a more deserving person. We grew up in the same town, yes, she'd lived in Everwood before. I"d spent most of my life here and she had as well. she was always so nice. never had a rotten or nasty word to say to anybody, was so timid and weak. almost fragile, always afraid of hurting someones' feelings. I saw alot of Amy and her and wished, dearly wished I could say that I didn't see alot of her father in her but I did,But not in the way you would think. she had his drive, his fight but not in the way he had it. it was a brave and couragious part of her that I could only respect, her mother wasn't strong, never had been. always gave in to whatever came her way. she'd grown up in a household where she wasn't respected or treated well, I remember meeting Rupert for the first time, I was over at Alicia's house, her father was home, he was always such a nice guy, her mother was gone and she was relieved, her mother wasn't all that nice, she cruel and abusive and I was over there helping her with some term paper she was supposed to write for her history class to pass our senior year so we could both graduate, I was strong willed, even back then before I'd went through and dealt with all of the things I knew of now, I was born that way, it was the type of person I was. but all I'd heard all week long was, Rupert this, rupert that. how he was the perfect guy for her and it didn't help matters that her own mother was pushing her onto this guy because he had money and could take care of her, and that she wanted her gone. To this day I blame her for alot of it. but when he walked into that house and I saw him for the first time, a part of me wanted to love him as my friend did, but a part of me felt something. something wicked and bad as if this was the beginning of a very long story. he was atleast three years older than her and was going to a prep school in England, the story supposedly was that he'd broken free of the school, had been traveling around, and was abandoning his education, I really didn't know much more about his past before I'd met him. At first he ignored me as if I wasn't the best friend of his girlfriend, he'd moved to everwood,been around so much that I thought he was "the one", and I was right, unfortunately",months later Alicia came bursting in through the opened door, her dark blonde hair spiraling down her back and her big hazel eyes glinting with excitement as she'd wore a long blue sundress that he'd bought her, there had been so much pressure put on her by her mother. where did he live, his parents. but when she'd learned that he had money and that she'd never want anything again if she was his wife, she wouldn't stop pressuring her daughter to press certain buttons to get him to pop the question, I never like to admit it but rupert was smart, that's what makes him so dangerous because he knew what was going on and his intentions weren't just to come in for a little fling and be gone in a month, from the moment he stepped into that house, the moment he saw her, her beauty, but moreso, how weak and dependant she was a decision had been made and from that day on her life was his in his hands. even then I couldn't stand him, I knew what he was, deep down I felt this dark danger when he was near. I even went was far as telling Alicia but she'd throw her hands up in there and smirk back at me smiling as if she understood, yet she really didn't.

"Oh Edna",you don't understand..He's a good man and he's going to take me away and give me everything, mother says he's going to spoil me and that any girl would be stupid to turn him down"..I could hear her words inside my head right now as I stood outside my house as if her ghost was standing right in front of me.

I remember I hadn't wanted to let it stop, I'd told her that I thought her mother just wanted her out of the house, wanted to give up on her because a man was willing to take her on and give her a better life, that she'd ship her off with strangers if she could legally do it and she hadn't denied that I was right but she just shrugged her shoulders saying how she thought I'd be happy for her..that was the last conversation we'd had face to face, sure we'd talked on the phone but we both knew that what I'd said was true, that she didn't want him, she saw all of the ugliness that was inside of him, his thoughts. what he wanted to do to her..and now a newborn baby..I'd wanted to say that he was marrying her because she was six months pregnant with his child, but i didn't have the guts and I wouldn't say that, not to Alicia. she was such a sweet person, so naive and innocent, you couldn't say such ugly things to her, but I did visit acouple of times. But I didn't see her, sure I'd gone for the wedding but after that my visits were short and she wasn't anywhere in sight, they lived on a large estate, she did live well, her mother was right. but there was more to happiness than money, her mother never realized that. I kept visiting for the child, everytime I saw her she looked more and more like Alicia and the parts of her that resembled rupert I tried to ignore even though they were as plain as day. they'd named her Amy, well not they..He. but after a while I stopped visiting, not because I didn't want to see my friend or my godchild, but because I didn't want to live with the knowledge of what was happening to them, I urged Alicia desperately with phone calls and letters to leave him, I never stopped trying, that if she didn't she'd be sorry. said that if she didn't do something for herself and Amy that the next time I saw her, I'd be standing at her grave. and I hadn't been wrong. I hadn't really been able to bring myself to see her grave, if I did then I'd be admitting that she was dead and that I had failed and he'd won, if I ignored it and pretended as if Alicia was still alive I could live with the notion that I hadn't failed, but it was weak, right now I just wanted to go off and blow something up,Maybe even rent the terminator, it always seemed to calm me down when I was feeling so bad and down like this. but I saw took all of my thoughts of memories and regrets out of mind as I rupert stood afew feet in front of me, but something else was happening, I just stood there watching, taking in all that I could see from where I stood.

A saw a tall blonde walking at a fast paste towards rupert. her medium length wavy blonde hair fell to her shoulders and her dark hazel eyes shined, but not with the joy and bliss that was of a nice day or a peaceful moment, it was almost eery. behind her she dragged a nine year old girl, or atleast I was guessing that's how old she was, her long dark blonde hair hung below her shoulders and her dark eyes stared up fearfully as this woman dragged her, even as the little girl dragged her feet, she didn't seem to care that the child I assumed was her daughter was in pain, in some ways I could see that it gave her some kind of pleasure.

Stopping, face to face with rupert. she didn't say anything to him, just knodded as if he was an old friend or they atleast had an arrangement for this to happen as she grabbed the small girl by the arm and pushed her hard towards giles with a small smile,from my eyes it appeared more like satisfaction, she backed up leaving her small child with rupert as she walked away if she hadn't planned to come back, atleast not for a while.  
Rupert walked over by me, holding onto the childs' wrist as tightly as he possibly could. up close she appeared smaller and I wandered if she wasn't nine at all, maybe younger. I feared that rupert would break her wrist with the way he was holding it, I didn't want to leave nad meet erv, now. not with this child here, alone with rupert. I couldn't trust that but now knew that I'd seen everything but he didn't make a fuss over it, just walked over, holding that girl tightly as he beamed..

"So", you saw everything. I'm glad. you were always my ace in hole edna. always saw things you shouldn't have seen, much like Amy..and Alicia. We know that turned out though..he admitted with a coy smile walking away with the child towards the house, I wanted to reach out and attack him, make him hurt for what he'd done to my best friend, what he was doing to his own daughter and what he would do to this little girl. but for the first time in my life, I felt weak, as weak as Alicia had been as weak as a child was..and he knew that my revenge wouldn't happen, it wouldn't bring her back, but he had power over me because he knew that I blamed myself, I'd failed as a friend and that's something rupert liked to play around with. but I decided not to ignore a day with erv so I left against my better judgement, wandering if this was another mistake, if this was something else I'd be punished for later on. "It was", I told myself with worry", but my stronger side spoke up", there was nothing I could do, her mother had dropped her off, left her with a monster. I had no power here just as I had no power with alicia, but I still felt guilt.

I wanted to rush over to her and tell her the mistake she was making, that rupert shouldn't be trusted, especially with children, no matter how stressed she felt but I got the feeling that this woman didn't care, that she was satisfied with the fact of the matter that giles was dangerous. I wanted to find her still and try to believe that she wasn't like rupert, I didn't want to believe that a mother could do that to her own child, irregardless of how spoiled the child could be or how stressed the mother was. she wouldn't do that. maybe she didn't know. but a voice down deep told me that I was doing the same thing I gave junior a hard time about doing, I was being thoughtful and foolish, wanted to belive there was goodness in a person that appeared to be rotted all the way through. but I still wanted to belive, I'd known giles and I'd been a part of his life, but I didn't know this woman. I could've seen things wrong. I guess now I was in juniors' position, and I didn't like it much.

INT. EDNA AND ERVES' GARAGE - LATER

P.O.V. BUFFY - EVENING

It had been hours since mom had left me I didn't know what to think, i couldn't move, I wasn't even in the same clothes as I'd been in before, rags were on me and they smelled bad, as if they'd been pulled out of an old pile of trash, I knew I wasn't really in the house. some other room, an attic or basement. maybe in a garage or a shed. I really couldn't see too well. i was tired but I didn't want to fall to sleep, Mama told me the more aware of times you are the more power you hold, why did I even listen to her. she did this to me. why did I even bother. but she was my mother. I had to believe this was love. she was making me stronger..that's what she said. why would she lie to me. I wandered with tears.

But I wasn't allowed to wear the normal clothes other people wore anyway, Dawn could though but there were reasons. mom showed dawn off everywhere as if she was a small china doll she needed to broadcast to the world was hers but me, I didn't know what I was to her. sometimes I wasn't even sure if she loved me. she told me that the reason my father had left was because he realized that I was a mistake and he'd gone because he knew he could find better, she'd even said that if she was in his place, she would've bolted,too. and that it was my fault that she couldn't.

I looked up seeing the man mama had left me with, he stared down with humor at me as if this wasn't just fun for my mother, but it didn't bother him none to help out.

Mama won't like me being in these clothes, she wants me in the clothes I came in, she wouldn't like this..I sobbed fearing that she would come in anytime and she wouldn't blame him for anything, she'd lay all of her anger on me, and maybe even Dawn this time. I just sat there, tied to the wall with another rag as the man started to laugh.

"She won't mind", besides your wearing my daughters' old rags. I remember the times I forced Amy into them and made her mother watch",this is reminiscent of that. I'll thank your mother when she shows up. I'm sure she'll be proud of what I've come up with for you, I think it's very important that a child learns vital lessons in life..he uttered cutting me free as he grabbed my arm forcing me over to him and sitting me on his lap as he began to force my old clothes back on so hard I felt my skin scratch. he then shoved me agains the wall in the rags that mother thought I deserved as I clinged onto a small metal box that was near as he confided in me about a time he'd forced his daughter into it and made her stay inside holding her breath for a whole night and said that if I cried, even let out a wimper it would happen to me to, so I held my breath, but it wasn't easy, I was never so glad to see mom as when she walked in but she showed no mercy as she smirked my way as if she had news but wouldn't dare say anything in front of this man. I didn't know what to think, moms' news never seemed to be good, I hoped it was that my father had made a mistake and that he was coming to take me so I could live with him, I'd even though of asking her. she'd just laugh in my face and say that I was trash to the both of them", i could just hear her", why do you think you wear what you wear, it's your punishment, for being born..she'd utter", I sobbed deep inside, for she didn't like tears either and there would be a huge punishment if she saw them", and most of all, I knew she'd attack dawn. dawn wasn't just my sister, I protected her, in a lot of ways, she was like a daughter to me even though I was only nine and she'd just turned four. my mother liked to play on that because she knew I had a loyalty to Dawn and dawn looked at me as someone who would protect her no matter what, I knew it gave mother a sort of pleasure that I couldn't even protect myself, let alone, my baby sister.

But mother knew what she was doing and she prided herself and knowing that she'd always win and that I was below her, called me garbage and said that if she didn't take the innitiative and punish me, if she didn't show me the error of my ways, who would. sometimes I really hated her. and this man I was with, I didn't know his name but he was terrible,too. but different. I didn't really hate him, not yet anyway. he hadn't picked me up outisde of my house and just took me away and done terrible things, mother had left me with him for another one of her annual lessons that were meant specifically for me.

I couldn't remember anything else that had went on after mother had left me with him except that I was scared and he said he was going to give me the same treatment he gave his daughter,Amy. and what a fool was I to believe that,that was a good thing. All I could think about was getting back home, to Dawn. no matter what mother had planned for both of us, I had to be there for Dawn. I was all she had and she had no idea how cruel and ruthless mother could be. I just wished that my daddy would come back, if he did everything would make sense, I didn't want to believe the lies that mother told me, how he'd wanted to leave and that I was the biggest mistake of his life and how he'd never come back because he'd turned both of us away, sometimes late at night I believed she blamed me for Daddy leaving. or atleast that's what she wanted me to think, how she wanted me feel. I knew that me and Dawn weren't full sisters, not really. Daddy wasn't Dawn's daddy. I didn't know her father and the times he'd come around mother had forced me into a metal box she kept in the pantry, in the cold and she'd make me sit inside of it for hours holding my breath as a punishment for me being born. I wandered what dawn's father was like. was he the lowlife mother said he was, or was he a good man who'd been destroyed because of knowing mother. I was at the age where I could see things more clearly, I wasn't a baby anymore, but I wasn't old enough to understand everything that adults could understand either, I was right there in the middle wondering if there was anything I could ever do to change things, would I ever just live with Dad, would me and Dawn be split up and live with our own fathers',would mother ever let go of us, even if I was garbage and she'd never wanted me, would she just hand me over to my father..I seriously doubted that. and even some of the things she said I had believed a time or two, that was the power she held.

Afew minutes later mother walked in, her hair swaying down below her shoulders and dark eyes gazing over me with an eery gesture as she glared at the man that she stood next to, she called him rupert. I'd never heard anything but his first name. never been told who he was or where he'd come from, but I'd learned what kind of a man he was..Just like mother.

She started to yell at him for not doing what she'd wanted to be done, that she didn't like him taking it upon himself to put his daughters' old rags on me and as she grabbed me I felt her undressing me and forcing the clothes I'd come in back on, I felt as if I'd pass out I hurt so badly,but she didn't care, My eyes rolled back as I closed them passing out but I wasn't really completely asleep, I could hear everything that was going on and mother didn't like that I was being so insolent, she'd used that word alot before the punishments would begin.

I felt her grab me as she told rupert that he was a pathetic excuse for a man and that next time he was to be harder on me, "I heard the words no mercy", as tears filled me inside as I felt as if I was alone and had no one to love or to love me. All I had was Dawn and a father I wasn't sure mom was wrong about.

Soon rupert withered away and everything else faded as I was carried away..home. but in this instance, home wasn't where the heart was.

INT. ABBOTT HOUSE - MORNING

P.O.V. AMY - MORNING

It was a new morning, different than the several past mornings where my father had been around showing me that I wasn't free, but this morning it was really hectic with Rose off trying to prove to some new women in town that she was not just another small town mayor but that she was versital and could roll with the punches, A saying I'd never quite understood. but Dr. Abbott was all excited about a new neighbor and wanted everyone to come together with making these people feel welcome in everwood. and I had nothing against it, I'd never really had a neighbor before, living on an estate I'd just never seen anyone else around but father and my mother..I guess that was normal for having rich parents. but this was a new experience and I wanted to welcome these people just as much as Dr. abbott did, I would surely help him, I was all he had now that rose was off talking to important people at a business meeting.

So I'd decided not to ignore this oppertunity and be a part of the community. It wasn't something I would turn my back on because if I did, I truly would be an outsider, it was what father wanted, for me to give up and be just another one of the people that did everything he said. I was my own person starting today, and no one could stop it from happening. it was like a force with hin me, a force that not even I could control.

But I did what I felt I had to do because if I didn't I was just what father said I was, I couldn't just give in to whatever he wanted, I lived with a different family now, I was a different person deep down inside..I wasn't Amy Giles, I hadn't been that girl ever since I'd been shoved off into a house of people I hadn't known, now I was Amy Abbott, whether father liked it or not.

But I followed Dr. Abbott next door with some freshly baked muffins and a note from rose that told him to keep his fingers out of them, that they were for our neighbors. he'd grumbled at first but then we started to walk next door wandering what the new neighbors were like, we both stood on the porch in expectance, I wandered if they had children my age, and I was sure Abbott wandered if they were going to make his life miserable or if they were quiet, sulky-like neighbors.

Once the door opened a tall woman sat there, her medium length wavy blonde hair down to her shoulders, her dark,emotionless eyes staring out at us as she wore oven mits, she must've been baking something, I thought.

Her expression suddenly, out of nowhere,changed. she smiled, beamed almost as she realized that the we were her new neighbors, even at that moment I noticed how she looked at me, as if she knew something about me and we weren't completely strangers. To me she seemed fake, but I didn't want to think such things, afterall this was me trying. I was trying to create a new life for myself and I needed to stop feeling that everyone was out to hurt me even though father said I was right to think such things, So I washed my thoughts clean and tried to see only good, even wanted to make these people my friends.

After we were shown inside Dr. Abbott shook her hand as she went on about herself.

"I'm sorry about the mess", As you know we haven't been here but a day and we're still putting things away and getting used to small town life, we've never stayed in one place too long",I spose that's my fault..she began as Dr. Abbott began".

I'm Harold Abbott, I have a general practice in town. the only general practice in town,actually. We live next door, This is my daughter,Amy..He introduced as I'd never felt so happy and so wanted to hear him call me "his daughter". it made me feel like father didn't own everything and everyone.

She smiled as if some part of her was ambarrassed but it felt like a mirague to me.

"Oh I'm sorry", How foolish of me not to introduce myself properly. "I'm Joyce Summers",Well I'm not married but I'm going through a divorce and some seperation issues. I'm sorry if I seem alittle unprepared for company..But your welcome to stay for lemonade, I just made some for my daughters',I have a child your age,maybe alittle older. she urged gazing at me as I knodded with a soft smile but she did nothing to lead me to a bedroom or a playroom where this child was, she just smiled and left us in the sitting room as she'd said she was going to get us some lemonade, said she'd squeezed it from an actual lemon and it wasn't the canned,frozen kind. I could tell already that Dr. Abbott had nothing but respect for her, raising two girls all alone. but there was something about her to me that didn't make since, I couldn't turn off what I felt and thought, I couldn't ignore what was right in front of me,but I couldn't exactly say what I felt either, I feared that if I did that Dr. Abbott would think I was bad, and he'd make me leave, make me go back with father, I could't run that chance.

After afew minutes Dr. Abbott went about to say he needed to use the restroom but I knew that he was curious if our houses were similiar and to snoop around into things that weren't his,but I was just as curious but everytime I'd snooped before father got angry, but father wasn't hear, maybe I truly was free of him, I"d learn later, that I'd never be free.

In the kitchen I stepped on a fancy marble floor with a large round oak table and in the corner I saw a small girl, about four years old holding a pink sippie cup wearing faded out clothes, more rags now, that didn't fit her. she was a pale white with long brown hair and bright blue eyes that stared up at me. the expression on her face reminded me of when I'd been her age, I had a feeling I was right about this woman afterall, she wasn't anywhere to be seen and the pitcher of lemonade still sat untouched on the wooden table. I wandered. Where was she?

I then saw an old wooden door, rotted or dilapidated and I stepped closer as the door opened I saw a room which seemed made of metal with a metal box that looked big enough for me to fit inside nailed or bolted to the bottom of the floor, around the side of the room I saw brick shelves with swords,knives and crystals all around as if it was a spiritual place, not just a pantry with no food inside, my eyes then gazed back at the metal box seeing a small girl my age inside, wearing nothing but old rags that might've been clothes once and a teddy bear that might've been colorful and new at one time. she somehow knew I was standing there as I backed up not knowing whether I should run out of the house crying, headed for home, or if I should stay and see if she was the person I believed her to be, but I couldn't move. I was so afraid. I watched as she dragged the small girl, her long dark blonde hair flying in every direction and her dark fearful eyes begging for help, but I couldn't hear her cry, or say anything as the door opened and that woman, that terrible woman tossed her out like nothing more than a trash bag full of unwanted and unneeded things.

"You better hope I open this door and let you back in before sundown",If I don't I'm sure some wild animal will tear you apart by morning", she growled out and I believed that she meant every word of it as the door slammed, the small girl still sat in the corner getting paler by the minute sipping her lemonade out of her small cup, other than her, I was alone with this woman..this woman who I now didn't trust at all.

Almost as if she knew the baby wouldn't do or say anything she glared at me as if I was just as terrible, just as rotten as she'd treated her own child, she grabbed my arm, not saying but what she did say hit me like a knife in the heart","Wait Til rupert hears about this"..and then I was in the dark, alone in that box, locked in and abandoned, but what I didn't know, I wouldn't be alone, not forever.

INT. JOYCE'S HOUSE - MORNING

P.O.V. BUFFY - MORNING

I hadn't slept at all last night, Mother hadn't opened the door last night, I'd slithered off to a small opening in the garage and I sat there all night, fearful of those wild animals mother said would rip me apart at her own will. I'd stayed there all night, but I couldn't sleep afraid that mother was right and I'd been bad and I'd be eaten by a bear or a tiger, not knowing that bears and tigers didn't exist, not in a town, not in a neighborhood like this. but I was just a little girl, I believed what mother said because she was my mother. Trusting her was what I was supposed to do, now wasn't it.

But gazing out of the garage, standing on an old milk rack that had been left in the garage from packing, i stood up high, still barely seeing through the windows in the garage door, but mothers' car was gone. Today she went to work, started her own art gallerie and me and Dawn were alone for a whole day, but I knew that it wasn't just me and Dawn, just before mother had thrown me out, yet again, I'd seen someone else, another girl. my age, maybe alittle bit younger.. somehow I knew she was still inside there. I'd never thought mother would attack someone else, I thought it was just for us. but I slid through a small opening that mother hadn't thought about as I stepped inside the house and I found myself in the pantry, sitting next to that box, that box with no windows, nothing to give way for air except for afew wholes at the top of the box, but I could hear the girl crying.

Mother hadn't forgotten about that small opening, she knew it would lead me directly to my prison and that she had the key to release the both of us, but she didn't know that sometimes when I was in here, when I was outside the door, that dawn would slide food inside, so I didn't starve but I was seldomly ever just sitting here by the door, drapped, I was always in that hateful,terrible box that made me weak, and angry, like a trapped animal that was forced to live like a beast to some reason unkown to her, or well me. there was no way out, in this room I was weaker than any other room, I knew what they were, it was the crystals that surrounded the room, mother would tell me that if I touched just one crystal that the syrum would rinse into my blood and I'd never be able to control my own thoughts or feelings, I'd be bound to her until I died. I knew she controlled everything and I knowing that I still loved her, I had to. she was my mother. but I didn't know about that man she'd taken me to as a punishment, I'd thought about running free, but she'd always catch me, and maybe next time she wouldn't allow me to leave that box, not ever.

So I sat there for hours and hours until the latch moved and the door opened, mother stood there with the man who'd taken me for a while before, I was afraid of him but nothing like mother,she unscrewed the lock to the box and used a key to open it giving the girl I'd seen breifly a good shove towards the man I'd learned was Rupert, but I knew nothing else about him, mother just glared at me, I wasn't still outside and she knew I'd betrayed her somehow, she didn't say anything, all she had to do was point to the box and I crawled inside and everything went black again,I knew that since I'd supposedly found that opening and crawled inside, that I'd be punished and probably wouldn't be allowed to come out for days and days, but I stayed quiet, I knew how mother felt about tears and making unneccesary noise,she'd hurt my baby sister if put up a fit or cried,so I steyed quiet, if not for myself, for Dawn. I owed her that much, We were sisters.

EXT. OLD FARM OUTSIDE OF EVERWOOD - EVENING

P.O.V. AMY - EVENING

I could see around the truck that I was in, father had caught me, he now knew that I believed that I was above him, free even and now he knew and now I was being punished for believing that I could go on living a normal life, that I could be free, but no one was free of father, not even mother, and she was dead. Edna even was a prisoner, he'd told me that before like he prided himself on the fact that she was in a maze and could't escape it.

Father didn't say anything, but I could tell that he was gloating, he was happy he'd caught me, like he proved that I was a giles' afterall and now he wanted to prove to me that no matter how hard I tried, I'd never be an abbott..Never. but I hadn't thought he'd go this far, not even Edna did.

As soon as the truck stopped I could feel father pull me out dragging me over near the side of a large,old wooden house as if this was plan and he'd known about my independance for days, he dropped me down in a hole afew inches deep and I was so weak, felt paralyzed by fear as he dropped dirt on me, and I knew I'd last afew hours, father wouldn't just kill me, I didn't know what he was doing, but he wasn't going to kill me. but I didn't know what he was doing, maybe that was precisely his plan. but as I looked up I saw the look of satisfaction in his face and I knew that I had lost.

Faintly in the distance as if it were a dream I could hear", Amy..That's right..Realistically speaking, you can't hear a thing, my dear. Not a thing..and then everything went black. 


	6. Chapter 6

Ch.6 Reborn from Darkness

EXT. EVERWOOD FUNERAL HOME - AFTERNOON

P.O.V. DR.HAROLD ABBOTT - AFTERNOON

Everyone just sat around and said nothing, I wanted to get up and ask anyone that could hear why this was happening, why Amy had to die, why someone would do such a thing to an innocent child, what was this world coming to, I had loved her like a daughter even though I hadn't known her long but Mother and Rupert, Amy's real father were fit to be tied. Rose just sat next to me as silent as possible, she hadn't said a thing since we'd heard the news two days ago.

Mother was greiving yet she stared acrossed the way as we sat on a bench outside the funeral home at rupert, as if her eyes could breathe fire and destroy him with one look of determination.

"I can't believe this has happened", Amy My poor,poor Amy..First I lost my wife and then my Father..and now Amy. I can't be alone. I mean, who would do this to an innocent little girl, who would do this to anyone..I don't understand..I'm going to find this murderer and destroy whoever it is..I could hear rupert say through his sobs as he put his hands over his face and began to shake uncontrollably as if he'd never recover and I couldn't imagine what it was like for him,Amy was really his daughter, losing her after he lost his wife and his own father. I felt sorry for the man, but it was clear that mother didn't, she wanted to tear him a part, by the expression on his face, what I'd thought wasn't exactly a misconception.

You should be ashamed of yourself, I know you did something, You did this to Amy, you've done alot of things that junior and the others should hear about, what you did to your own wife..your father. I know more than you could imagine and I'll share everything but if you did this, if you killed amy, you better watch you're back, I don't care what junior or anybody else thinks..if you did this..I'll destroy you..I heard mother threaten as she stood up and walked off, I couldn't believe what I was hearing as I stood up and walked after", Mother", I called trying to persuade her to come back but she left me behind.

But I didn't follow her, I knew well enough not to go after her when she was this upset, usually my father would do this but he was gone and she was with Erv,Erv had noticed her dissapearance and went after her leaving me behind to ponder why she said such things.

INT. OLD FARM HOUSE - LATER

P.O.V. AMY - LATER

I sat in one corner of a small room in that old farm house near where father had tried to bury me alive, not meaning to kill me but to teach the abbotts' a lesson, he said certain lessons all people could benefit from and it was a life lesson. I couldn't move too well. I was so sore, I ached all over feeling as if I'd never be able to walk, let alone move, he'd just dropped me here in the middle of the night, hadn't said much, just dropped me on this hard floor as if I'd been dead couldn't feel how hard he'd dropped me or how he'd contemplated the fact that I could've been dead already and thought it was a lesson that I could benefit from in the future when I believed I was free of him, and I knew now that I'd never be free of him. I'd been a fool to look at myself as Amy Abbott, and not my given name..Amy Giles.

My senses seemed more attune to what was happening around me, I felt as if a part of me had changed when I'd been underneath all of that soil, a part of me had died under there..the part of me that believed that I could outwit father, that I was smarter and I could have a life with the abbotts, I didn't have nothing now. the Abbotts thought I was dead, they'd had a ceremony and everything and now I was just a small child again depending on father to do what was right when he never had done what was right in the first place.

I began to hear footsteps and creaking of the wooden floor under someones' feet, i stayed still. so still and closed my eyes fearing that it was father even though the footsteps were footsteps of children..Children my own age that seemed much more threatening than that had been. father wasn't around, but I didn't know that. I didn't know anything, I was trapped like a little mouse in a maze, just what father had wanted.

Soon two kids walked in as I saw them I began to calm down alittle bit as I recognized the older girl, the one who was my age. her long dark blonde hair hung down below her should and her dark eyes stared at me as if she'd suspected that I wasn't dead. the girl standing next to her couldn't be much older than four, with her long brown hair down to her shoulders, her skin so pale and fragile, with big bright blue eyes that stared at me with curiosity, probably wondering why I was here when she'd been to a funeral for me. they both wore clothes that looked more like rags, Rags that had been clothes in some time and place but weren't nothing much anymore. rags that father had found accomidable for me when I'd lived with him, I feared that I was going back into that, what I hadn't known was that these girls had come with a plan, not just to find me and prove that I was alive and not dead, but a plan that could get us all hurt or killed.

"I knew you were alive", My names Buffy and This is my baby sister,Dawn. I had to find you to prove that you weren't dead and I have. Remember, we met you when you came to our house before", I know that mother hurt you. I'm sorry. but we're good..We're harmless,Friends..Honest..Buffy told me as I wanted to trust but father had destroyed my trust in all people and what their mother had done had been so awful, but I couldn't believe that they were bad,too. Father was terrible, a horrible person,really..But I wasn't. I liked to think that I didn't deserve all of things that father said I deserved, But I was weak and sometimes was made to believe his lies, things that Edna told me I shouldn't believe, I had at one point in time. and still could believe from the things I knew he could do.

"You shouldn't ignore your mother", If you get caught you could get hurt. she could do what father did to me. You seem so nice and I want you to be friends, but if you get caught because of me, I don't know what I would do..I'm sorry but you should leave..I told them with tears inside, I really didn't want them to go, alone I felt unguarded and fearful, with them around I felt as if somebody cared what happened to me and I wasn't dead to the world like father had told everyone outside of this farmhouse.

"It's okay",I know I'm breaking the rules and I don't care. She's at the wake, everyone thinks your dead. she thinks that we're at home but I'm sick of things. she's left me with your father acouple of times and I'm afraid of him and if he could do to me what he did to his only daughter, i don't trust him. and mother, mother is just as bad. Me and Dawn are leaving and we're never coming back here..I don't care what's out there, it has to be better than this. I thought you'd want to come along, I know you wanted us to leave but he'll be back soon and we're friends now..I wanted you to come along so we'd be free..Even if you don't believe, we don't either. but it's better than just rolling over and giving up. She told lme as I thought about it a moment wandering if we could really get away as I knodded my head as we sneaked out a window hearing an old engine, I knew it was father but I followed them into a small bilding with a wooden door, a storm cellar for when their were tornados or bad weather,Buffy seemed to think that it was the only place we could hide and that they wouldn't look for us here, but I feared that they would. father would comb the whole grounds down and if he saw something like this he'd known we'd hide out here..he'd just know it and he'd know it because it was a logical place, the safest place to hide.

I hadn't wanted to do this from the start, it was a bad idea. I wasn't ever going to get away but I didn't blame buffy or her little sister. it wasn't there fault they believed it might work, I was a fool to think that today had been their first time and I felt sorry for them, but I knew that we'd failed the second I saw footsteps staring up into fathers' face, he beamed as if this was the fourth of july as if he respected my defiance and this was a high point for him, but he didn't just beam at me, he beamed at Buffy and Dawn as well as their mother stood right beside him, she didn't smile, didn't smirk, just wore this expression that dared to reconed with, but in some way it was playful as if she wanted her daughters to challenge her, she was like father of which made me sick.

"I'm Sorry My Dears", I respect that you're still strong enough or the case may be, weak enough to try to test me. it's always a challenge and I thank you but there's a price for everything, you're mother learned that first hand and now it's you're turn",I think Alicia would be rolling over in her grave if she knew this but then again, that's an added bonus,my dear"..He admitted with a sinister glow about him, I wanted to somewhere else..Anywhere..Anywhere but here..Here with Father. and he knew that and that was why he had the power and I didn't.

He didn't say anything more as I Cowered to my knees in emotional Agony hearing as their mother took over, she wasn't directing her words at me but I felt sorry for my newfound friends because I knew what it was like, I had lived with father and I wasn't sure I didn't now.

"Good for you", You know something. That's always been a trip for you're fathers', they've known things and never kept their mouth shut but i have a feeling that it's going to be different now, Especially once we get home, Buffy, Either you control you're sister or I will. I believe you know what that means. I heard joyce growl at my friend, I wanted to take action but I was weak and father was there, I knew it was for the best that I kept quiet.

I Stood up once they had climbed out of the storm shelter and It was my turn to get out as well, but father stood there as he pushed me back down into the dirt as I'd realized that dirt wasn't my friend, I knew well that this conversation wasn't over, I didn't know what he was planning to do or if Mrs. Summers had gone, I just knew that father had a plan and when father had plans everyone suffered, Especially me. 


	7. Chapter 7

Ch.7 What is Fear

ext. Everwood Park -afternoon

Buffy's Point of View:

It was a new day and mother had left Dawn in my care even though I was only nine years old, I'd taken Dawn to the park so she could play and have fun, things normal children dead. I wanted to do the same things but if I let my guard down for once second, one second, something bad could happen and it wasn't just fo rme, I had to protect Dawn, if there was one thing I did right, that was it. she was my baby sister. her safety was all that mattered and I didn't care how many rules I had to break to ensure her safety.

I took dawn's small hand as her light brown hair swayed in the window and her bright blue eyes twinkled with delight, afterall this was a real treat for her. I tried to bring her to the park whenever our mother was at work and we knew she stayed at work for hours because she was the boss so it gave me time to give dawn things that we both weren't allowed to have normally, we'd go to the park. most kids wouldn't come at this time of year, or if they did they'd stand in the feild and throw snow balls at eachother or play hide and seek, me nor Dawn liked them games. it was mostly the hiding and seeking I hated, but we weren't fans of physical activities either, we just came and we'd use the swings for hours even though they all creaked and our legs glided acrossed Ice, it was the most excitement we got all week, but we could never stay long, we never knew when mother would be back, we had to play it safe, I had to play it safe for Dawn's sake. I wouldn't allow her to hurt her. she was only a baby,really. barely four years old. she'd just had a birthday afew months ago but like so many before, mother wouldn't allow us to celebrate it.

But as we neared the park I saw Dawn runaway from me and I didn't understand why she was running, she usually was well behaved when we went on our journeys to the park and did things we were forbidden to do but as I caught up with her I saw what the big deal was, sure, it was raining and storming, all dark but we weren't afraid, we never were as I neared as I my daddy..and a man i didn't, I didn't know that he was Dawn's father as well. My father put his hands out and I ran to him crashing into him as He lifted me up into his arms as the man next to him whom I vaguely remembered had lived with us before we'd come here lifted dawn up into his arms.."Thank god you're okay"..he said over and over again caressing her as my father did me, was he dawn's real father, I knew me and Dawn were half sisters. But to me, that didn't matter. I was older than her and she was like a daughter to me because of the age difference and my responsibility over her. I knew it was my duty to protect her but something to told me that I could trust him, that he was a good man and I knew my own father was..I didn't believe the lies mother spoke of. My father would never say those things about me. he'd come back for me. they'd come back for us. I told myself with tears of hope".

"I think Ice cream is a must", the stranger I presumed was Dawn's father said as they walked on with us but they weren't strangers and we weren't afraid of going with them, our only fear was that they would bring us back".

Nearly three hours later we were in there two story home acrossed the town when I could hear mom slam the doors open downstairs as if she knew where we were all along and whose house this was as I clinged onto my father and I noticed Dawn clinging on the man I'd learned his name was Angel, although I had only used my father say his name once or twice. it was an odd name for a guy, I knew that for sure.

I didn't know much about what had happened but I knew one thing and one thing only, I knew I didn't want to go with mother. I wanted to stay here with my father and a man I trusted as a stepfather, who was Dawn's father, I wanted to stay with them but mother wouldn't hear of it, the moment she stepped inside, the rules changed.

But we'd had our day of happiness and excitement and that was good enough for now, so as I stared at mother who seemed preturbed, for once not at me and Dawn but at the two men who had taken it upon themselves to take us out and give us a day to remember, as we neared her she grabbed dawn before I could prevent it and demanded that I go to the car and wait for and that she wanted to talk to Dawn's father alone but I didn't fully listen, I stayed outside listening to what mother said to Dawn and her father as I began to hate her more and more, even though she was my mother.

But I listened closely even though I knew I wasn't supposed to, lately I'd been getting even more brave, maybe it came with the age, I didn't know. All I knew was if I wasn't strong then who would be there for Dawn,I was all she had right now and I would do the best for her, I'd promised her father I would take care of her, and unlike mother, I wouldn't break this promise.

"Did you actually think you were going to swoop in and grab the both of them and get away, that I would let you take my girls", I'm not having this conversation with Hank because he doesn't understand me like you do. there's a reason that I discuss everything with you,Angel. you were always the one but i'm independant, I don't need a man to complete me, I'm sure hank is bugged by the fact that Buffy is independ, just like me. but dawn..she's special. so you better keep in check..wouldn't want anything to happen..Afterall, she's just a baby..I heard mother say as I knew she was coming and I could hear that man I knew breifly but liked swear at her, but I got to the car and I knew, I didn't know how I knew, But I knew that mother would know, she told me once that she knew everything.

The ride home was quiet, too quiet. but it was because mother had singled me out, made me ride in the back seat alone and had Dawn up front in the car seat next to her, I was alone and I couldn't protect the things she had planned for my little sister, who was I kidding? I could barely save myself. and I was scared as that familiar fear swooped in inside of me as we pulled in front of what I recognized as edna abbotts' place, I liked her. she was always sweet to me, gave me cookies, but she also showed me survival skills, maybe she was the reason I was a survivor..as soon as the car stopped, mother came around to my side of the car, pulled me out leaving me on the ground, she sneered at me smiling to herself, but the next time I opened my eyes.. the car was gone..Mom was gone..but most importantly, Dawn was gone. I was alone, I just prayed that Edna and Erv were the only people around.

Before I knew it I could feel that man, that man that mothe rmade me stay with time and time again dragging me, I knew his name was Rupert..I fought back as he dragged me but I was only 9 years old, there was nothing else I could do, I couldn't fight back, he was strong. he was an adult and mother had left me here knowing what kind of a man he was. I truly hated her, but I feared for my sister. I feared for her so badly.

stopping he dropped me as he pushed me to the ground with a snicker on his face.  
"I'm Sorry',My dear..Did you actually think that I wouldn't try to repay you for being a friend to Amy",Any friend of Amy's is a friend of mine..He smirked and I feared he'd killed me so sat up grabbing his ankle as he turned red looking down at me with questioning looks as I pulled as hard as I could dropping him off of the mountain as I stood up, I noticed Edna was behind me, she'd seen everything as he'd said choice words as he fell, not to her but to me.

I knew that she was proud and she hated him but she couldn't exactly say that, she'd have to hide me, if he died it would be my fault. I was in trouble but she never asked how I got here, somehow I think she knew..She knew that mother had abandoned me, if only for afew hours , and she wasn't willing to play into her or that man's hands..I trusted her. I trusted her completely.

I stared back at her not knowing what I was supposed to do or say, I knew he was a bad man but murder was never the right way to go, he couldn't have survived but I'd be wrong because he would, there was very little that stopped rupert from doing anything he wanted to do, I can't believe how niave I'd been but atleast I'd hurt him as Edna came up to me putting her arms around me and telling me that it was okay, but I wasn't so sure that it was okay.

"It's alright", Lets go and talk to Amy. she's inside. I pulled her out of that storm shelter last night. I didn't believe for one minute that she was dead. I know rupert alittle too well and he wouldn't do that to his daughter, he may have done it to her mother, my best friend, But Amy is all he has left and he knows that, he wouldn't do anything to kill her and now you're here with me and I know that he didn't take you or you didn't walk here, I saw you're mothers' car pull up and I saw her leave you, I couldn't get to you in time, but then again I'm not really too sorry about the outcome, Junior and everyone else in this town know that if I could've, I would've done it myself..she told me as she led me to her house as I felt as if I had a friend, but I knew that mother would be back, mother always came back.

As soon as I stepped inside, Amy stood up, she'd been sitting at the kitchen table with Erv eating some store boughten cookies and drinking warm milk, Erv was trying to cheer her up but failing miserably as she saw me she got up and walked over and hugged me as she told me that she hadn't known that I was here which meant she didn't know about what had happened, I was almost afraid. Whether or not he was a terrible person, he was still her father. would she hate me..would she vow never to speak to me again, was he still alive. I'd seen afew feet down holding onto a rock for dear life, and I knew that Edna had stepped into the other room to call someone and do the humane thing and get him medical attention as she'd just said he'd had a good fall and had lost his ballance up on the mountain, she hadn't told him that a nine year old child had given him an extra push.

"What's going on"? Does your mother know that you're here. I don't want you to get into trouble..Amy told me as I knodded", she left me here. she'll probably be back one she hears what's going on. I just hope you don't hate me, I did a terrible thing..I know we're friends and I hope we can still be friends when I tell you that you're father could die..I explained as she looked at me disbelieving".

"what"?! Could die..What happened..She asked with curiousity more than worry.  
"Mother dropped me off",abandoned me here again as a punishment so I wouldn't know what she was doing to my sister and he came out of nowhere and he started dragging me up the mountain, I'm sorry. I thought he was going to kill me. he started mentioning things of how he killed your mother and how he killed you and you were at the bottom of that mountain. You're the only real friend I've had so I got upset, when he pushed me to the ground, I grabbed his ankle and fought him, he fell down off of the mountain and is hanging onto one of those big rocks..that's why Edna went to call someone to get him help.."I'm so Sorry"..I sobbed fearing that she'd hate me, she just rolled her eyes as if she was hoping for the worst and not for the best", It's alright. He won't die. he'll be in the hospital for a while. Father never stays down for long. I shot him once..It was last year, before he brought me here, he was down for three days and when was well again I wished I wouldn't have done anything..What you did, You shouldn't have..I'm not worried about him. he's cruel and mean and I know he's my father but I fear him most of the time, the way you are with you're mother, but I'm worried about you. Once he's better he'll come after you, he'll consider it his responsiblilty to look after you, He'll consider you a second daughter. You shouldn't have done that. Now he'll hurt you too. I care about you, You're a friend..I didn't want this to happen, But I don't blame you. Maybe you can stay here and you're mother won't come back, maybe things will work themselves out..she told me as if she was forcing herself to believe something she'd given up on herself".

A huge weight was lifted off of my shoulder upon the moment I learned that she was still my friend and that I'd done nothing wrong and everything ran smoothly as we stepped outside with Edna, Erv stayed inside and read the morning newspaper giving us space as we watched as Rupert was placed on a stretcher, being lifted up the mountian and rolled into the back of a red and white ambulance to be taken to the local hospital in town while we just stood there, I thought he looked hurt pretty bad, even though he was still alert, even though he'd been cut and bruised and his head was bleeding, Edna seemed to think he had a concussion, she said that it was common knowledge for her to know this since both her ex husband and her son were doctors.

"He won't be down for but a week", It don't look too bad. I wish he would've fallen to the bottom"..I heard Amy say but Edna didn't yell at her or scold her for thinking illy of her own father and I sort of understand", as a familiar car pulled up as I clinged onto edna, I didn't think she'd be back this soon, I could see the empty car seat and wondered where my baby sister was but I backed up as Mother slid out of the car, she didn't even shut the door behind her as she began to lecture Edna saying that she'd heard what was going on because news traveled fast in Everwood, that she'd been looking for me everywhere and then she started to accuse Edna of kidnapping, I told her that she was a liar and nobody would believe her but she ignored me, she'd remember everything I said Later, I knew that for certain. All I cared about right now was", where was Dawn?

"I thought this was a respectable small town where I wouldn't have to worry about my kids' safety and you of all people", I can't believe this. You can't just steal someones' child and get away with it..You're not going to..Buffy, Get in the car..Get in the car now..I heard mother call as I told her no"..she sneered thinking that what I said was pretty amusing, a part of me even though she liked how I fought her every chance I got, how I didn't just roll over and give up like alot of kids would, but the humor she found wasn't the kind of humor that you would want her to find..when I didn't move she grabbed me by my arm giving me a good shove forward", Buffy Anne Summers..When I say do something you do it..she yelled as I found my feet pulling myself upward and into the car as she gave edna one last threat that she would be back, and she would back with Everwoods' finest, which meant cops..she was going to put Edna in Jail. How could she do that. she'd abandoned me, nobody had taken me. but she was crafty, my mother. she wouldn't allow anybody to hear my side of the story, as far as she concerned with me, I had no voice..and Dawn..She hadn't talked for a year..the only thing I'd heard her say in a long time was when she'd seen her father..she'd called him daddy..otherwise, she was as quiet as a mouse. and If I hated anything, I hated that.

The whole car ride home she went on saying how it was a terrible thing that the men had come back into our lives, she meant it more for my father than dawns. she spoke of Dawn's father with high regard as if he was a precious token in a game she could move from one area to the next as if he was hers and hers only, she wanted me to refer to him as Angel and not Dawn's father and I had no problem with that. I liked him. he was a nice guy and like me he was willing to stand up to mother and not let her walk all over him as my father would do, and dawn was only four, she didn't have a choice.

"Angel is special and he should be around and should be trusted",Buffy. and I want to trust you. I want to trust that you're different than you're father. someday I believe you'll have more of heroic heart, Like angel. there's special people in everybody's life and we all pull together to help eachother, to do what's best for that one person and maybe dawn will see all that she has and she'll learn to talk again..but then again. maybe she's just a weakling afterall..Mother said as I wanted to open the door and run out, but I knew that she would find me, she always did and if she didn't somebody would, I'd be made to go back. the last time I'd ranaway I'd suffered big time for my actions, although I couldn't say that I'd been punished to the limit that Amy had. but her father was suffering now, I saw to that. but for how long would he suffer, I wandered. would he try to hurt me when he got out? those fears plagued me now that I knew that he would surely recover.

From that day on I knew not to trust anybody, except angel. Mother was right about one thing and that thing was that Angel was special, he was a good person and I was safe around him, I knew that when I was near him, nothing bad could happen and my duty in life was to protect Dawn..other than that I knew that I was alone in life..alone with my fear. 


	8. Chapter 8

Ch. 8 The recovery

Amy's Point of View:

It had been weeks since father had been put in the hospital, I'd went back to living with the Abbotts, of that in which I was glad but I'd heard what had happened to Edna, she was being held in jail until she could prove that she didn't steal my friend, that she hadn't done anything wrong and Even Dr. Abbott had tried to get her out but he didn't have any sway where this was concerned, it had nothing to do with him, it was between the town of everwood, his mother, and Mrs. Summers. and little did we know, Buffy's mom got what buffy's mom wanted. I hoped she wouldn't this time.

The times I had to go and visit father he'd sit there and laugh for hours on end about Edna's recent predicament saying how there's a price for sticking your nose in other peoples business and that he wished he had a photograph of her sitting in a jail cell wearing a orange jumper as if this gave him some sort of pleasure but when we spoke of buffy's mother he'd just smirk.."Yes", she thinks she has everything figured out and that none of this will ever come back on her..Not that I completely hate her but someday, she'll be sitting just where I am now..Trust me, my dear. it might even be soon. father would say as I hated buffy's mother, but he deserved to be where he was, But I knew that the only person that would be hurting because of where father was would be buffy and someway, somehow, I had to protect her from it..From him. but how could I protect her, when I'd never been able to protect myself. that was the million dollar question.

Dr. Abbott had been so concerned with fathers' condition that he'd taken it upon himself to address the doctors getting him the best care and because he was a giles, he automatically got nurses and doctors working with him around the clock and today he was being released, I knew that Dr. Abbott had wanted me to visit him more, to be more of the honorary daughter to a father that was much like the perfect father in his eyes..the perfect man, but this man I'd grown fond of didn't see things for the way they really were, he saw things black and white with no shades of grey, he didn't see who father truly was, he didn't know that with making a deal with father, it was much like making a deal with the devil. I hated being in this position, I knew that eventually years and years in time that he'd regret taking me in because father would make him hurt for his part in all of this, it was who father was..The old saying reigned true.."You play with fire, you get burned", well Dr. Abbott was already playing with fire and that was why I was so worried.

I'd spend most of my day up in my room contemplating what was going to happen when the abbotts returned with father, I knew that Rose saw things clearer than Dr. Abbott did, she questioned the fact that I was supposedly dead and he had been the one to tell everyone in the first place, she questioned it, to where he did not. he said that father must've been the most shook of everyone who knew me and to find out that you're child wasn't dead, he felt sorry for father, having to go all through all of that. I was glad he didn't know, Maybe it was better that he believed in the lie, lies were easier to live by and you could remain in your happy realm and feel as good as you wanted to without it bothering you, if he knew it would kill him, if he truly knew what kind of a person father was, I didn't think he could deal with the feelings he'd feel. I don't know how I truly felt and I'd only been born into all of this. All I kept thinking was that none of this made any difference, nothing was ever as good without mother. and he'd purposely taking her away from me, to prove who had the upper hand and that he could turn my world upside down and steal the one thing I had left. He may have been my father and there was a part of me that knew I had to love him because of that, but there was a part of me that could never love him, he was a monster to me and I feared him.

But coming back to live with the Abbotts, that was different. In a way, I was different. I wasn't the same girl who'd been delivered to them, a weak, and shy little girl feeling as if I could change my life and except the abbotts as my family, I'd realized, this was just a house with friendly people in it, they weren't no more my family and I'd never be able to wear the abbott name knowing that I deserved to have it and was truly an abbott, I'd always feel like a cheat because it was just another lie, I wasn't an abbott, I was a giles, A name father said I should accept with dignity and respect, before I'd believed that I could grow up in a world that wasn't all cruel, that things would change if father only left me alone so they truly could but again, I had changed in these last two months. I wasn't willing to believe the lie anymore, I'd accept the name because I'd been adopted into it so, partially it was my name to accept, but deep down inside I knew that I'd learned a lesson, father had made his intentions clear, not with words and warnings, but with his actions. He hadn't had to dig me up after he'd buried me, he could've just left me there to die. it was another one of his tests. and now more than ever I wasn't comfortable in this house, It wasn't who I was, i wan an outsider a stranger and in a way, I felt that me and Dr. Abbott were even more distant than when I'd first come, he'd thought I was dead and had accepted my death and grieved, I'd thought that I'd never see any of them again and now it was like I'd been reborn but the thing was, I wasn't reborn into honor and understanding..Innocence..I was born into fear and darkness..Father saw to that.

I knew that they would be back anytime now with father, he'd want to see me, it wasn't until today that I had thought about what was going to happen when father came back. Before I'd merely lived with him, he'd done whatever he'd wanted with me and I hadn't thought he'd planned to give me back, It was Buffy who changed things, she was the one who injured father. I wasn't mad at her, so many times I'd wanted to do the same very thing that she'd done and acouple of times I had hurt him, but he never stayed down long and when he came back, the person that caused his injury..he was more ruthless than ever. more dangerous. I was afraid for Buffy. I'd heard what father had said in the hospital. that she was like my sister now, that one act could connect us for life. otherwise I'd be happy. I liked Buffy. she was my best..My only friend..but when father said stuff like that, He wasn't thinking like I would think. I knew that buffy was in trouble and I felt bad for her, I only had father which was enough in any case, but she had her own mother too, I wandered if she was alright, I hadn't heard from her in a while. although I knew that Edna was in the hospital, to be released tomorrow, I knew it was just cops doing their jobs..But I hated the fact that they would go along with it. She was a good person and I hadn't had a feeling towards buffy's mom until now", She was no different than father. except father didn't like legal chains binding people down, he liked to deal with people face to face. I didn't understand what this woman wanted to prove, what her angle was, but eventually I would. I was sure with buffy being my friend, it would come up eventually not that I would be the one to bring it up. I wasn't that kind of a person.

I could hear the door downstairs open and people talking, apparently that woman was downstairs right now with some guy I didn't know. he seemed kind of quiet, his voice sounded irritated as I could hear Dr. Abbott", Amy come down here. there acouple of people that would like to see you"..He called", I took a deep breath standing up, I didn't want to do this, I hated the idea of going downstairs but I wasn't given a choice, I hoped that one of the people that wanted to see me was buffy, But I could tell by the talking that it wasn't, but I could hear dawn. she was talking, I'd never heard her talk before and it was odd to see this I appeared in the living room standing there, frail, and fragile not knowing what was going to happen.

The man who stood next to Ms. Summers held dawn in his arms. he was tall and handsome with brown hair and hazel eyes, Dawn's hair was brushed into pig tails and she was wearing a white and blue dress, much different than the clothes I saw her and buffy wear the times I'd seen them before and she seemed happier as she said alot but not many people could understand her, she was four years old, but her jabbering was more like that of a 2 year old, you could tell she hadn't spoken in a very long time and I could tell that her mother didn't like it.

"Is Buffy around"? I asked sensing that maybe if they were here buffy was as well.  
"No", Buffy isn't here. She's being scolded right now and I don't like her hanging around with you", You're father has filled me in on some of the behaviors you've had and I think you're corrupting my child"..She snorted as I noticed the guy next to her glaring her way when in theory I'd thought he was her friend or a boyfriend, maybe even an ex husband or something, I hadn't thought his feelings for her defined what hate was all about.

The guy ingored her and looked towards me.."Hi", I'm Angel and you know my Daughter Dawn..Dawn, why don't you go play..Angel told her as I knodded whispering that I was glad to meet him as I could see father in the corner snicker at how shy and quiet I was being as if he couldn't wait til everyone left and we were alone to discuss the future", but I quickly turned away from him as I led Dawn up to my bedroom, up there she didn't say a word, she returned back into the young child I was used to seeing with buffy, every once in a while she'd turn to me and smile and then I sat beside her as I tried to show her that I was a good person, that I was her friend and she could have fun when she was with me, that it was expected. and when she spoke it wasn't alot, but it was enough. "My sister says that Daddy's going to take me away from mommy"..that we're going to go far away and live like in the fairytales.."..she whispered in a small childs chipper voice", I prayed for her that her dreams and wishes came true, we all deserved it but that didn't mean we got what we wished for, I'd learned that the day that father had buried me in a hole and I'd thought he was going to leave me for dead", I knew now to not trust anyone, I knew I could trust Dawn and Buffy..I hoped I could trust that man downstairs. he said his name was angel. But I knew I couldn't trust Buffy's mother. I felt so weak, so fearful when she was near, as if I was another child that she could screw around with, another life hanging in the ballance, I knew deep down that the abbotts were trustworthy, but it was hard to trust them when I'd lost everything when I'd been taken away.

Hours later I could hear footsteps, I prayed that it wasn't father but it wasn't as the door opened and angel stood in the doorway with a warm smile. I got only a warm feeling when he was near as if I could trust him and I didn't need to question if he was a good person but being me, I couldn't trust until I knew that he was decent. I couldn't trust him without knowing him first. but he stepped inside as Dawn ran to him calling", Daddy..he lifted her up as he turned back to me as if he knew something, something that Edna knew, something that rose thought she knew and he smiled my way", If anything happens to you or he pulls anything, I know the abbotts are decent people and can't believe the truth, and I know we just met but I'd like to be a friend..and if anything bad happens", Please call me. he ordered as he handed a peice of paper witha phone number on it to me as I realized he wasn't staying next door and was glad to take it but wandered if I truly could trust him", Tell buffy that I said Hi..I added as if he'd see her before I did", he smiled. I will"..he retorted as he shut the door and I was left in silence waiting for the footsteps that would come once father knew we were completely alone, I wandered if I would stay with the abbotts this time or if father would make me leave, I was afraid that he'd take me away but as I heard his footsteps, they were different for the fact that he now had a cane because of his fall", but I knew he was coming for me..and I was afraid, for a moment I'd thought about locking door, but I could just hear fathers' remark to that.

The door opened as father stood there with a sneer on his face as if he'd ran a big race and had gotten the top metal for it, after the door shut I could hear snoring acrossed the hall signaling that the abbotts were fast asleep and it was just me and father as he smiled waving his cane as if he didn't truly need it as much as he said he did but that he could also use it as a weapon if he had to, I knew he would. and I was afraid that it would hurt so I knodded my head promising to behave myself, not that I'd been the one to attack him, but it wasn't like I hadn't thought about it a time or two. Even though he was my father, he wasn't the kind of father you ran to dote on when he walked into the room.

"you know", I think you're getting wiser as the days go by Amy", perhaps you're more like me than you origninally thoughts. You're mother could never accept that she now power, and my power has no limits. she was headstrong until the day she died , but you amy. you've got guts. but you're not stupid. What buffy did was stupid and I assure you, I'll get to her eventually, What she did just proved that I should've been focusing on her from the start, afterall, Wouldn't you just love to have a sister? he asked with a smile on his face as if he was about to win the lottery".

"Don't hurt her"! You deserved it..I growled out not knowing where I'd gotten the guts to stand up to father but it felt good", but I instantly regretted it as he grabbed me by my hair, pushing me into a wall as I could tell that I was bleeding, but father didn't believe in doctors, he liked to see how strong or how weak a person could get before they started to pray for their lives, when I'd compared him to buffy's mother", he'd snorted and said that he was a respected man, a respectable father.."Amy", the things that she does"..the levels that she'll go to our endless. atleast I have morals..he'd say". I learned never to say that again.."Better hope for yourself that you don't have a concussion", I'd hate to bury you for real, my dear..he uttered with a chuckle as I could hear the door slam behind him", in my mind it had been much louder than it truly had been", but I soon fell asleep and I wandered in my dylirium, was I so hurt that I would never wake up again..atleast now I kind of knew, atleast now the truth was out that I could stay here, but what good did it do when father could come and go as he pleased and nobody questioned why he did the tihngs he did. 


End file.
